Is social interaction actually enjoyable or just socially required? (thelemmy.club)

submitted 1 day ago by userreality@lemmy.zip to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

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I genuinely don’t understand how people see social interaction as something beautiful or natural. To me it feels like pure obligation.

Even at work you are not really yourself. You are adjusting how you speak, how you act, and how you respond just to fit the role, satisfy your employer, and keep things smooth with colleagues. That constant switching can be exhausting.

Outside of work it does not feel that different. Conversations, replying, small talk, making plans, it can all feel more like maintenance than real connection.

And yeah, I can agree that most people are not fully themselves in these situations. Everyone is performing to some extent depending on the setting. The difference is some people find it normal while others find it draining.

Sometimes it feels like people are not actually enjoying it as much as they say, they are just used to it being the default way to live.

Maybe I am missing something but I do not see the beautiful part everyone talks about.

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[-] Evil_Shrubbery 1 points 16 hours ago

Lol, "high quality people", that's inventing classes & intolerance where it's not needed.

So if I speak a language the other party doesn't know (even tho I know their language & can speak it) I'll be able to get a good thing going?

Social disguise does not exclude being completely honest. That is a separate thing!

Also you think ppl are dumb & can't differentiate between social masking & what the words that I'm speaking mean?
I connect well with ppl listening to the meaning I try to convey, it's way harder with ppl that take your social vibe into consideration (bcs now I have to modulate that as well as my words to get the same meaning across).

You will turn away high quality people who can see through your disguise . . .

The "disguise" as you call it isn't a secret, it's meant to be understood & looked-through. That's how all deeper relationship work bcs even what you would call "no disguise" (which imho isn't a thing bcs we learn cultural norms, we aren't born with them) works just as a disguise bcs the limits of communication are just so vast.

[-] flamingleg@lemmy.ml 1 points 12 hours ago

i think we are in agreement

this post was submitted on 01 Jun 2026

79 points (98.8% liked)

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