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submitted 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) by QuinnyCoded@sh.itjust.works to c/onehundredninetysix@lemmy.blahaj.zone

I already wrote everything out on a different comment but I wanna do an update and ask for advice

I kinda autismed my way into a date and I think I have an online girlfriend now???

I made a friend who is single who I met a couple days ago, and we were texting and she said that she's a barista or something so I asked if she would show me how to work the coffee machines in a VRChat world and she agreed.

She had to take her estrogen shot and it happened to be my estrogen day too so we both took out estrogen on a discord call together.

Then we made matching strawberry iced drinks and were sitting together at a booth, we started chitchatting about jobs and college and stuff and how bad the state of computer science jobs are when she said "this isn't really the kinda thing that you're supposed to talk about on a date" jokingly. Then it hit me that you typically don't just take estrogen together and go to a Starbucks alone platonically.

long story short we ended up falling asleep together watching an anime

she's so pretty too, I genuinely have no idea how I managed to do this 😭😭

edit: come to think of it, she did ask me if I'm T4T (trans for trans) the other day...

she also is like an hour away from me too

so uh... idk what to do chat. I kinda just did it by accident. I've never been in a relationship before and especially not one as a woman, idk what to do 😭
should I ask to meet up irl, or keep it online for a while? if we do meet up, what would we do?
what's the normal person thing to do in this situation?

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[-] Ashiette@lemmy.world 36 points 2 weeks ago

In your case, the only advice you need to follow is that you ought not to follow any advice that has been given to you.

You do you, it worked.

[-] anzo@programming.dev 3 points 2 weeks ago

And there's no goals (i.e. sex) or speed (kiss "now"). Just enjoy the company, talk through, see what are your feelings, don't pressure yourself into anything (neither pressure the other.)... Love can be like the blossom, it takes its own pace and is all admirable.

PS. Hope it helps. At least, this is what I tell myself, as I started dating someone recently after some months alone and a very lengthy relationship previously. So, I am kinda "fresh" and not knowing what to do. But this strategy has been paying off, and seems the most natural and healthy..

this post was submitted on 28 Mar 2026
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