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submitted 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) by violet08@lemmy.today to c/asklemmy@lemmy.world

edit: the date isn't happening anymore. he texted me asking if we could change the venue as he realized he can't really afford that restaurant at the moment (???, why was this realization so last minute) & i told him no worries i can pay for everything. he told me no way i could ever let a girl pay, it's not fair to the girl and also "emasculating" to him. hate that attitude. called it off and cut contact. thank u, next.

So I hit this guy up on Insta, and we’ve been chatting for the past few days, calling and video calling and all that. Tonight he’s taking me out to dinner; just a date, nothing more. I talk to my parents about everything, and they told me to observe his behavior but keep an open mind.

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[-] ClownStatue@piefed.social 3 points 2 days ago

It’s kind of a sliding scale. Add 10 or 20 years to both ages, and the gap becomes less of A Thing. As you both mature (yes, you keep maturing into and past your 30s), the gap between “adolescent” and “adult” gets smaller and smaller. It can actually happen pretty quickly depending on how “worldly” the people in question are. No offense but while the law might consider the 18-yo an adult, that’s still a kid. And before anyone asks, I wouldn’t have too many issues with a 20-25 yo person looking to date an 18-yo. Not zero issues, but waaay fewer than this situation.

OP, if you’re just having fun go for it; but look out for yourself, and listen to words of caution. Plenty of 18-yo college freshmen have dated professors and come out just fine. At some point, the age gap will probably play a part in ending it, at least this time. There’s nothing saying you two don’t remain friends and return to a second relationship after you’ve experienced your wild 20s!

this post was submitted on 13 Mar 2026
24 points (77.3% liked)

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