Nobody can live their life with zero connections to deadly violence, so trying to change minds by force is coercive. And they hate that, so they want a pejorative word for it, so they came up with calling it “terrorism.”

Ehhh...
I feel like you are generalising a lot of variance into "anti terror" crowd. There are layers to non-violence and people have different beliefs.

Also, in the Healthcare case, the target was MUCH more directly connected to the harm that is acted against, as well as in intent and severity, than the victims in 9/11. He was the target, and I don't see anything like intent to invoke fear in the general public.