My face just looks like this since I hit 40. Haven't checked on my balls - beer gut is in the way

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[–] 43 points 10 months ago (30 children)

To be fair, nobody be they man, woman, or beast, believes that balls are attractive to anybody without a weird testicle kink.

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  • [–] 24 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (11 children)

    I dunno, I think a lot of male-attracted people enjoy a good pair of balls

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  • [–] 52 points 10 months ago* (8 children)

    I had a one night stand where the guy warned me he had only one ball. My immediate (in my head) reaction was I would not have noticed.

    They shift around on their own and sometimes one or both hide for some reason, and honestly I respect the hell out of such a chaotic organ, but they are purely unreliable. Just imagine going through life thinking testicles are stagnant and neat, two nuts in a skin sack, only to find out half the population has these roving jizz pebbles constantly on the move. Our word for 'planet' comes from the greek word for 'wanderer,' and so should testicles have been named. They wander the groin as the trepidation of the spheres rolls planets across our skies. Never still.

    So I guess they're okay. He didn't want me to touch his ball anyway.

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  • [–] 4 points 10 months ago (1 child)

    I respect the hell out of such a chaotic organ

    just for curiosity, what else is a chaotic organ?

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  • [–] 5 points 10 months ago

    The liver. Gets high as fuck without dying (much,) can Terminator 2 regenerate itself — like if you gave someone half your liver (in their body) you'd both end up with whole livers, and it's the most delicious of the organs.

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  • [–] 6 points 10 months ago (8 children)

    "nobody"

    What a fucking asinine comment. Don't project your opinions onto everybody else.

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  • [–] 0 points 10 months ago (7 children)

    Damn getting rage responses from the pro ball crowd. Didn’t expect to see that one.

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  • [–] 5 points 10 months ago (6 children)
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  • [–] 4 points 10 months ago (4 children)

    A million puns instantly spring to mind, but I won't use a single one. They're all low hanging fruit anyway.

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  • [–] 1 point 10 months ago (3 children)

    My balls started sagging this year, speaking of low hanging fruit. I like it! My balls don’t stick to my legs when I jog anymore!

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  • [–] 3 points 10 months ago (2 children)

    I've seen some pretty attractive balls in my life. It's just most people with balls are often very crusty.

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