26
Question about not dating anymore
(lemmy.sdf.org)
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
this post was submitted on 08 Jul 2025
26 points (96.4% liked)
Relationship Advice
3124 readers
7 users here now
Welcome to the Relationship Advice community on Lemmy and Kbin!
The ideal place to ask for help with your relationships: romantic, friendships, we don't know what we are yet, co-workers or just human interactions in general.
Please make sure you read our rules before posting.
Rules:
Rules can be clicked on to be expanded.
1: Treat all users with respect. [!]
The goal of this community is helping OP and readers, not making fun of them. We are an inclusive community, any sort of disrespect towards ethnicity, sexual orientation, religion, etc, will not be tolerated.
2: Mark sexual content as NSFW. [!]
Posts containing mentions or descriptions of sexual topics must be tagged as NSFW. This includes descriptions of sexual acts, requests for advice in the bedroom, explicit descriptions of your body and similar content.
3: All posts must be a request for advice.
All posts must be phrased as a request for advice or as a question. Sharing of stories, personal anecdotes, or past mistakes are only allowed if they're followed by a clear and relevant request for advice with the situation.
4: Provide sufficient and relevant information.
Your title and body need to contain enough information relevant to your situation, such as ages, genders, and the relationship between people mentioned. For privacy-related concerns, we recommend using fake names and broad general locations.
5: Comments must be on topic and relevant to OP.
Comments must be directly related to helping OP, asking for more information, providing relevant resources or otherwise relevant to the thread. Off-topic comments and remarks, suspicious attempts at gathering personal data from OP or other readers, or bullying will not be tolerated.
6: This is a community for requesting advice, not moral judgement.
Moral judgements, "AITA?" and other similar questions are better served by different communities.
Reddit reposts are allowed.
As a temporary measure and the result of a poll, Reddit reposts are allowed following an expanded set of rules: https://lemmy.world/post/317115
How are rules enforced and bans applied?
For the most part, this community operates under the assumption that users are acting in good faith and should be given second-chances for their mistakes. Posts and comments with very light rule violations, or otherwise undesired but mostly harmless content, can be removed by a moderator on a case by case basis without any further punitive actions.
For violations of our rules, we follow a “3 strike” system as follows:
-
1st violation: 72 hours ban + moderator warning via PMs.
-
2nd violation: 1 week ~ 1 month ban + final warning via PMs.
-
3rd violation: 1 month ~ permanent ban.
The goal of this system is making sure users are made aware of their behavior before being permanently banned, but also protecting the community from any rule violations.
Exceptions:
While the “3 strike” system will be applied to the majority of situations, rules marked with a [!] in the sidebar signifies a rule that, if violated in an intentional, malicious or significant way, can warrant an immediate permanent ban regardless of the number of previous violations. This includes severe disrespect to users or groups, dangerous content, and similar.
Related communities:
-
Adulting: [email protected]
-
No Stupid Questions: [email protected]
-
Mental Health [email protected]
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
Of course! Not just as a saftey thing, but interacting with people not as a possible extension of my own life so to speak really changed my outlook.
It may seems kinda obvious on the surface, but so much of our lifes (at least in my experience) we're trained to always be looking at people as potential partners and when you do that as a default its almost viewing people through a lens of "what can they do for me" and if they are the puzzle piece you're looking for. When that happens you don't really engage with people on a deeper level since you're not approaching them as complex, complete, independant lifes outside of your own, but rather as a "character in your story". And when society trains us to be that way it happens subconciously, even when you may not realize it.
It took time, but deprogramming that part of myself has helped me connect with people on so much of a more personal and respectful level. And in turn being able to do that made me someone more worth being around. Which eventually that did lead to my current long term relationship funny enough, and we plan to get married. Though we were friends for around 3 years before we started dating, and that has helped in its own way. Your partner should be your best friend after all, they're the teammate you choose. So being someone worth being friends with helps a lot.
I’m happy to hear you’re doing well in a solid relationship! I wish you both many years of continued happiness!!
Your perspective and your journey are really interesting. Definitely something to consider personally.
While I’m inclined to make a conscious decision to be single, reflecting on how I perceive relationships is probably something worthwhile to do.
Again, thank you so much for the responses!!