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this post was submitted on 29 May 2025
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No Stupid Questions
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No such thing. Ask away!
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Okay, literally none of these are the ACTUAL answer to the question, and if you're in the US in a position to take a polygraph, I want you to succeed. These people saying that it doesn't work DO NOT MATTER, even if I happen to agree, because you're going to be taking it either way. So, as someone who has actually TAKEN a polygraph with the CIA for a TS Clearance (12 years ago), allow me to tell you the actual answer from my experience:
Before the polygraph is hooked up, you will spend as much time as you need going through every question you will be asked. You have the opportunity to bring up concerns with question ambiguity then. They will work with you to make sure that you feel comfortable answering any question they ask with a straight "yes" or "no". I don't remember what the specific wording was when they asked me that question, and it would technically be illegal for me to tell you anyway. I hope that this is more helpful to you than "hurr-durr, it doesn't work".
You fell for snake oil
Did you actually read my comment? Again, I am not saying that it works, but that it doesn't MATTER whether it works, because they are going to do the polygraph anyway, and this person needs to know the actual procedure, not useless navel-gazing about how, surprising nobody, the US government uses ridiculous tests, spends obscene amounts of time and money, and all of it amounts to a fucking vibe check.
YES, it's WORTHLESS, but that isn't going stop the fucking fascist across the table from you from judging you by it, and arguing over it is PRECISELY as worthless as the test itself.
OP needs to state to their interviewer that they're a strict constitutionalist, and take the oath so maybe they can do something good, or at least prevent something bad. That's it.
The polygraph process doesn't care about what the person means because it isn't even measuring personal convictions or whether the person even thinks they are lying or telling the truth. If you think a polygraph has any meaning whatsoever other than what the person 'reading' it wants it to mean then you have fallen for snake oil.
They will judge you no matter what you do. The polygraph is just setting dressing like the room you are interviewed in and how the interviewer acts and how they word questions. The squiggles on the paper don't mean anything!
Right, and they need to know what the process is, because the ACTUAL interview is at the BEGINNING, without the machine, like I SAID at the BEGINNING. That is the part that they need to focus on.
Christ, it's like the only reason you're responding is as some kind of "gotcha". You can either provide useful information about the process, which is what actually matters to this person, or you can just keep acting like a dick.
That person is an idiot without any actual real world experience. Good on you for sharing useful information. I’ve had colleagues and employees like him lose their job before even being hooked up because of their shit attitude and my advice to folks boils down to the same. Be respectful, be transparent, even if embarrassing (there is nothing they haven’t heard before), and just give your “yes”, “no”. Best case you don’t see them again for 3-5 years, worst case it’s inconclusive and they will run it again a couple times and you will be more used to what’s expected. Go in with a shit attitude with your head up your ass and nobody is feeling bad that you pissed away a salary/job security perk and will never think about you again after a weeks time as they press on checking the box and taking care of themselves.
I wouldn't go into the polygraph telling the person running it they were using set dreasing any more than I would tell a cop in an interrogation room that their setup was just intimidation tactics. I also don't tell execs asking for people to participate in Myers-Briggs bullshit that they are just using modern astrology. I would just ignore the polygraph the same way I ignore other stuff and focus on the questions and answers.
I successfully go along with stupid job interview bullshit successfully even though I know they are trying to provoke a reaction. Same thing if they use a polygraph, just go along with it and bitch about it online.
That is the good advice!
I understand the bitching and they are certainly stupid. I get defensive about it a bit because not everybody has the head on their shoulders to separate things, read the online discourse, and screw themselves over. Everyone knows it’s stupid, just play the damn game. I don’t want some junior inexperienced person setup for failure because they got themselves a hot head is all. Appreciate the clarification.
You should work on your reading comprehension.
No.
Nobody succeeds at taking a polygraph. They successfully complete an interrogation that happens to include a polygraph as part of the process.
It is an important distinction.
I am now convinced that you didn't even read their comment past the first sentence.
The "success" is about the person succeeding in getting a job, despite the fact that they use snake oil during the hiring process.
The person is interviewing for a job. If they want the job, they have to take the stupid test. It's really not hard to understand.
Where did I say anything about not taking the polygraph?
I dunno bud, you seem to be confused as to what you're even arguing about. The person you attempted to call out literally agrees with you.