this post was submitted on 22 Apr 2025
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It's taken me a while to realise that you don't ever "finish" cleaning up. I'm probably going to die while there are unwashed dishes that I need to do. There will be dirty laundry that needs doing. I will also have things that I've Been Meaning to Get Around To.
Not in a dreary way, but just that this is what it's like going through life. It helps put things in perspective when I realise I'm not actually capable of finishing all my todos. It's just a process that you go through while alive.
I go commando because I just have no underwear while wearing two different socks. They will find me keeled over like this eating in a restaurant. Kitchen dirty of course.
I also don't care.
It's you! The Unfinished One!
This was very frustrating for me when I went through it. I was in a growing phase, trying to get my life on tracks, and I HATED that I could never have all my clothes I love to wear washed while still being able to wear them. Obvious, I know. But it really wasn’t something I had encountered before, because I never really cared about keeping things tidy.
It’s funny that once you decide you want things tidy, you realize they never truly will be.
You can clean up all the cans, but you will crack another.
You can do all the laundry, you gotta wear it
You can clean the plates, still gotta eat off of them
Just chill, there's an insurmountable amount of work to have a perfect house. Is that what truly gives you happiness, or is it the untidiness that gives you unease?
And either case, is that truly coming from you or the family/peer pressure?
It’s neither, honestly. Great question, really.
I’ll be honest: I’m an alcoholic finally doing the work to never touch that shit again. So in that, I’ve been doing a lot of “finding myself”. I’ve been trying to be a bit more conscious of things and to also do a lot less sitting around playing video games and watching YouTube and Twitch. And I’ve found that being in a nice space is really comforting, so I started working on my tidiness. And that’s where I found those things I mentioned.
I wouldn’t say it’s coming from my family, it might not even be coming from me. It feels like a “societal” thing. I hate to use this example, but like Jordan Petersen saying “make your bed”.
I don’t know, I’ve also found myself feeling “worthless” in the dating and sex scene, so it’s also probably coming from there. I think “what girl would want to hangout in a shitty room?”
I got a lot to process lmfao
That is wholesome to hear. And I get you, society has some norms that are actually healthy when you mention it like that: shower frequently and don't let the house turn into a stinking cave 😃
Good on ya, and remember to be grateful to yourself for the results and actually take a minute to enjoy the outcomes.
Great comment, but IMO telling someone to "just chill" almost never has the desired effect.
That is the goal though, so I'm not saying you're wrong.
I feel this comment intensely. I have no idea where this dissatisfaction comes from, but it was just an invisible part of the lived environment for most of my life, and only now am I realising that we're chasing something, an end state, that is fundamentally unachievable.
Maybe it's the video games. I'm waiting for an achievement to pop up so I know I'm finished lol. :P
Yep
I'm in a less is more phase. Consciously not pursuing certain things if it means I can get it with extra effort, and putting that effort into appreciating what I already achieved.