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A couple IRL trans people I know are convinced that I'm trans and it's adorable (hexbear.net)

submitted 4 days ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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God if this happened 15 years ago I'd be super upset and defensive. I try to apply the Hexbear Code of Conduct in the real world, so I'm probably above average for cis men for being decent to trans people (but still there's a lot of space to grow!). I've always failed miserably at being a normal cis guy, I'm shit at sports, I don't do tough guy attitude well, and I'm pretty kind and emotional. I've also taken advantage of the recent explosion of gender fluidity recently to update my style a bit: there are more pinks and pastel colours in my wardrobe than their used to be.

I forgot to mention, my voice has a bit of a "gay twang", as friends have told me. Thankfully it's never bothered me, but I get asked if I'm gay a lot.

So maybe it's partly my fault, but a couple of the younger trans people in my life are convinced that I'm a trans woman. I think it's sweet, they've let me into their secret club. They often reassure me that I'm a woman if I want and that's OK.

My only real fear is that I'll waste their time or their good intentions. They seem really motivated to help me socially transition, but I can't see going anywhere past a cis dude that sometimes wears cute shirts.

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[–] [email protected] 4 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Thanks for sharing! I talked with my therapist about similar stuff, and it's nice to see other folks with similar thoughts.

This video introduced me a two-axis gender spectrum (around the 4:44 mark), which I really liked bc I'm pretty apathetic about my gender identity.

There was a post recently that talked about how transphobia also makes cis folk's life worse bc it limits how they can express themselves (similar to how homophobia limits how men can express affection for other men, or misogyny limits their emotional expression).

If transphobia is high, the only folks challenging gender norms are going to be the bravest ones that care deeply about not conforming to the norms. A cis guy who kinda wants to try wearing a skirt might not care enough to risk backlash, but as transphobia is lessened, folks are more willing express themselves in gender-nonconforming ways.

I think there's likely a snowball effect as more folks challenge the norms and just wear whatever they want instead of concerning themselves with what's "correct" for their gender, so I'm glad we've got folks like you that are normalizing nonconformity!

[–] [email protected] 1 points 4 days ago

I found a YouTube link in your comment. Here are links to the same video on alternative frontends that protect your privacy: