this post was submitted on 30 Mar 2025
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God if this happened 15 years ago I'd be super upset and defensive. I try to apply the Hexbear Code of Conduct in the real world, so I'm probably above average for cis men for being decent to trans people (but still there's a lot of space to grow!). I've always failed miserably at being a normal cis guy, I'm shit at sports, I don't do tough guy attitude well, and I'm pretty kind and emotional. I've also taken advantage of the recent explosion of gender fluidity recently to update my style a bit: there are more pinks and pastel colours in my wardrobe than their used to be.

I forgot to mention, my voice has a bit of a "gay twang", as friends have told me. Thankfully it's never bothered me, but I get asked if I'm gay a lot.

So maybe it's partly my fault, but a couple of the younger trans people in my life are convinced that I'm a trans woman. I think it's sweet, they've let me into their secret club. They often reassure me that I'm a woman if I want and that's OK.

My only real fear is that I'll waste their time or their good intentions. They seem really motivated to help me socially transition, but I can't see going anywhere past a cis dude that sometimes wears cute shirts.

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[–] [email protected] 26 points 4 days ago (1 children)

so I'm probably above average for cis men for being decent to trans people

Well, well, well! Quite an ego we’ve got here. madeline-smug

But to be honest, I would more realistically put you in the top 1% (if you actually end up being a cis man). I’ve literally never seen a single thing from you that was even remotely transphobic, and that’s not something that many cis people can claim.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 4 days ago

I appreciate it. To be fair, I had a lot of transphobia inside that Hexbear beat out of me. I didn't take part in any of the vicious struggle sessions, but I definitely read and gained from them. So thank you trans people of Hexbear for making me grow a lot.