submitted 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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It’s someone from work. We planned on meeting at a nice vegan place. I’ve been waiting for an hour. Texted her a couple times at half hour intervals. Dunno what to do.

I mean, I will see her again. Cuz work. Just feels really shitty cuz I thought we could be good friends at the very least lol.

Edit: so, there was a possible explanation. I don’t know how plausible it is tbh. I can see either way. But we both apologized. I’m going to remain hopeful. I laid out my schedule and she said she did want to meet and that we can reschedule. I don’t know when. Waiting for her I guess. I dunno how assertive to be. I’m not good at this shit.

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[-] [email protected] 16 points 5 months ago

I laid out my schedule and she said she did want to meet and that we can reschedule. I don’t know when. Waiting for her I guess. I dunno how assertive to be. I’m not good at this shit.

IMO, lay back and wait for her on this one. If she wants to (and is a reasonably reliable person), she will hit you up as soon as she can. If she doesn’t, it’s up to you to decide what kind of effort you want to put in because she’s either kinda flaky (absentminded, unreliable) or just not as into it (friendship or more) as you are. Give her a couple of weeks to a month. Maybe drop some reminders at work (“Hey, I’d still like to go out sometime if you have some time soon!”) but leave it up to her.

That’s an easy way to know if she’s into it, and if she’s maybe not (if she doesn’t get back to you), you could still pursue, but knowing it may never work and that you will be putting in more effort than her. Either way, I agree with came_apart_at_Kmart when he said:

another thing I've learned to do is occupy and enjoy myself spontaneously in pretty much any context, rather than refrain from an activity or socializing until an invited person arrives. it makes life more enjoyable and eased any pressure on late arrivals who feel bad about circumstances beyond their control.

If possible, have fun without her. Go ahead and your favorite appetizer, enjoy for you.

Best of luck!!

this post was submitted on 29 Dec 2024

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