Parents made me perform a Christmas bible reading and a prayer knowing I'm not Christian/religious (hexbear.net)

submitted 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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CW Rant with some discussion of familial trauma, religion, mention of substance use

I drove over 6 hours to see them and be present for the holidays and they went out of their way to cross my boundaries and make me uncomfortable. I didn’t want to be rude when they put me on the spot so I read the verses they wanted to humor them, but then they asked me to lead a fuckin prayer. They are aware I’m an atheist and resent that fact; I try to respect their beliefs but they push theirs onto me like this. I said a short prayer to get out of this whole situation and my mom started crying and smiling huge like I was just converted. Feel so weird and gross about this. They roped my partner into participating too and they’re of the same mind as me on these things so it made us both uncomfortable and anxious.

This incident was just icing on the cake of a trip full of my emotionally abusive mother starting constant arguments, my family trying to get me to drink knowing I’m sober, and being around my siblings one of whom is I’ll just say an abusive shithead. I don’t think I’ll bother going next year. I recall vividly why I was hyped to move out and why I don’t call more often. The neglect, manipulation, and abuse of years in that household all came flowing back. No wonder i deal with so much mental health shit lol

Edit: sorry if initial phrasing doesn’t convey the reason the prayer got me but it’s because I left Christianity due to the institutional abuses I experienced and witnessed, not just because I’m not religious these days. I just got put on the spot and due to family history went fight or flight and compromised my needs to get out of there asap. Really just needed to vent abt this didn’t want to spark confusion or debate sorry

Sorry for the rant just wanted to vent to my cool internet stranger friends

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[-] [email protected] 5 points 5 months ago

As someone who was raised Christian and still has some level of religious participation, this is unsettling to read about. Using that kind of pressure on someone to do religious activity is repulsive, the Bible has a lot to say about promoting people to take part in the religion non-genuinely.

You've done nothing wrong and are entirely justified in not coming back. Tell them about all the boundaries they've crossed, and that it's neither okay nor useful to try to coerce someone into halfhearted religious activity. You're fully within your rights to say you'll never come back unless they promise you they won't make you take a role in religious stuff, or prompt you to drink, or anything else you want to include. It's worth it to live your own life, not their projections of it.

this post was submitted on 26 Dec 2024

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