this post was submitted on 11 Nov 2024
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Comic Strips

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[–] [email protected] 28 points 1 month ago (3 children)

The Thieves Guild punchcard: Get 12 muggings and the 13th converts your mugging to a light burgling at the address of your choice! [*]

[*] You must present your punchcard before physical violence begins. If the address to be burgled is a police station, the next mugging will be upgraded to murder. Management takes 75% of all tips. Do not make Management sad. You wouldn't like Management when it is sad.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago

Addendum, The establishment known as 'The Bucket' on Gleam street is considered a police station for the purposes of this punch card.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago (2 children)

That first bit reads so much like Pratchett

If it's not then props, it reads almost exactly like a line from one of the Night Watch books would

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

That's exactly what I was going for, but I changed watch house to police station for the non-Discworld enthusiasts.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Success, I'd say. You're really a frood dude who knows where his towel is finger guns

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

Thanks, but lately I feel more "Oh no, not again"...

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

It really sounds like something that Mr. Pin and Mr. Tulip heard from a guild member in The Truth, but I can't find the reference exactly.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I hope the thief has his licence ready, otherwise the guild hall is getting a new weather vane.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

Where I'm from, we strung 'em up by the bura'zak-ka.