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Abuse is abuse rule (lemmy.world)

submitted 1 week ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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[–] [email protected] 35 points 1 week ago (27 children)

I have a friend who I haven't been able to hang out with for several years because his wife is insane and posessive, and he's decided to just ride it out until the kids are all 18 so he can divorce her without having to pay her child support.

He'll still support his children, but he'll do it directly instead of through her.

[+] [email protected] -35 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (23 children)

Wow, think of the example he's setting. If his kids were in that marriage, would he recommend waiting for 1/5 of their life to go by with a horrible person? How will his kids even know how to have a loving relationship if his parents are that fucked up?

He's a coward who cares more about money than about being a good person or dad.

And that's most men in these relationships. Men would rather cheat and lie than be honest and extend basic respect and communication to their partners. And then get upset when women finally initiate divorce for the broken shitty relationship.

[–] [email protected] -4 points 1 week ago (5 children)

You're being down voted, but I mostly agree with you. Putting your kids through the issues of your failing relationship isn't doing them any good either. There's no good answer, but staying for your children is often putting them through even more trauma than the divorce would.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 week ago (1 children)

My child seems to be in a reasonably healthy relationship. It's a wonder since I put them through a few bad ones, but I eventually left. They've been in a stable relationship for five years. I don't pry much and I pray they aren't staying because they feel they'd flounder, otherwise. Their partner is a good person, in not implying they aren't. Compatibility is a thing, common interests are necessary.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Yeah, it's possible for sure. I know I for one have issues caused by my parents constant arguing and issues (and they somehow aren't divorced, though I believe that should be). Sometimes people go through hell and come out better for it, but I don't think we should expect that.