Lavenderism

Many loans, especially student loans, are annoying and will not resolve themselves until a certificate of death is acquired. Unless you have a near-death experience where you are dead for a few minutes before coming back to life, you would most likely be considered to be engaging in fraud if you claimed to be dead to escape debt. However, the god of death has a lot of lawyers and can provide us a solution to this. You would be considered “Spiritually Dead” by those of us who practice Lavenderism which means you are considered otherworldly and a ghost with a physical body, which is not technically alive in the official paperwork of the gods.

The difference between being legally dead and spiritually dead, is that being spiritually dead means paperwork in the spiritual world considers you to be dead as opposed to paperwork here by the governments of the land of the living. Being considered spiritually dead also allows you to practice necromancy and perform certain rituals easier, at the cost of feeling out of place in the land of the living, thinking about your own death more often, and maybe having higher dark triad traits or psychopathic symptoms.

For this ritual, call upon any deity that is associated with death. The Black Fox is the obvious choice, but you can call upon The White Fox, Baron Blackjack, Maman Meche, The Drowned God, or The God Of Fear And Hunger. You say the following;

“Oh gods of death I want to be considered spiritually dead by the governments of the underworld. I will be allowed through the gates of hell by the border guards easily, I will be able to speak to the dead, and I will be immune to any kind of debt from the land of the living! I am spiritually dead, but what is dead may never die!”

This ritual is associated with The Black Fox but is made possible due to influence from The Drowned God.