this post was submitted on 29 Aug 2024
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A Japanese teacher once told us how one of her friends married a Finnish man. His wife was basically the only Japanese person he could practice Japanese with so he ended up speaking Japanese like a polite, middle-aged woman, which her friends found incredibly funny coming from a burly Finnish dude
Japanese is a bit unusual to English speakers because there is a much more pronounced gender divide in word usage, and even to some extent how words are pronounced. The R-sound is probably the best example here where it spans the spectrum of a rolled-R, which sounds very masculine and aggressive, all the way to an R-sound that is just barely a tapped-R (to the point where you'd be excused if you thought it was an L) which sounds very delicate and feminine.
Of course choice of words skew to different genders across all languages but in Japanese, for example, there are multiple words for "I/Me" that vary in how masculine or feminine they are so the linguistic gender divide is really quite stark to a native English speaker.
In Japan women are also expected to speak with a higher pitch. Another teacher said she kinda forgets to do this living abroad and that she gets asked if she's having a cold or if she's angry by her friends and family when she visits home.
In one class a student told us how in Japan she was taken aside and advised to speak in a more feminine tone so people would find her less intimidating. She was a bit shocked because she just naturally had a louder, deeper voice