this post was submitted on 19 Aug 2024
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[–] [email protected] 15 points 3 months ago

Oh! I actually know the answer to this one!

Cuz the perpetrator was experiencing excited delirium which, to the untrained eye (and the trained eye and the doctor's eye and any eye that doesn't belong to a police officer), can LOOK like a seizure. According to numerous completely un-ridiculous lawsuits, the lawyers and doctors paid ~~off~~ by Axon have determined that repeatedly applying the electric shocks of a taser actually CURE excited delirium!

So, the fact that this man survived PROVES that the ~~assaulting~~ responding officer actually saved his life from an episode of excited delirium! Had the man died, it would have meant that the officer did everything within his ~~incompetence~~ power to rescue the man, but he simply succumbed to the grip of excited delirium. Also, had the man weighed the same as a duck, they would have had to burn him.

THIS OFFICER IS A ~~MORON~~ HERO!!!

In case I was too subtle:

/s