Ask Lemmy

I think this is a good example of some of the issues men face. That their issues do not matter because others have it worse. And like you show it is always lost in the general grouping of things. “I do not care how badly you as an individual has been treated because the group you are part of hasn’t been as hard done by as another group. Therefore because you are part of that group your issues matter less”.

Nope, thats not what I said nor what I meant.

Here, I'm make it easier to understand. Lets say we have two 35 year old men: Jim and John. Two years ago Jim suffered kidney failure. He's been struggling on dialysis all this time just to stay alive. Multiple times a week he has to sit attached to a machine for hours to filter his blood so it doesn't kill him. It causes bruises on his body. He gets sick easier and stays sick longer. Its an existence, but its pretty miserable. Jim has been set back for years not able to hold a job because his illness has caused him to miss work. He's been spending any spare money on medical bills or expenses related to his kidney failure. He has no savings.

John has been active and healthy. He's been able to focus his energy on his career. Its increased his income, and he owns a nice house. He has substantial retirements savings, and plenty of extra money in the bank. Now, up until yesterday John was was healthy. Today he was diagnosed with kidney failure. He has his first dialysis appointment 3 days from now. Later that day a donor kidney becomes available and its a match for both Jim and John. However, since there is only one kidney, it can only go to one of the men.

You're advocating that John, should get the kidney.

There always seems to be thus weird idea present that because say women have had it worse in the past that things need to be evened out by men having it worse now.

Nope, I'm not ignoring that men because they are facing these issues women have faced for years/decades/centuries. I'm saying that if we have resources to fix one of them, we should address the one that has been hurting longer.

Bad things have happened in the past yes, that goes without saying. But short of a time machine it won’t ever be fixed

Incorrect. We can't fix sins of the past entirely, but we can certainly do whats possible today to make it right. In California, Bruce's Beach is a good example of this. Institutional racism has had multi generational negative effects on wealth accumulation. Bruce's Beach is a good step, but it doesn't help the millions of people of color that have suffered because of practices like this including Redlining that even today results in lower wealth for people of color.

but discrimination or issues in the present of any kind should be fixed.

I'm glad you agree! Where is your action to helping women with all the issues you cited just started happening to men? Where is your advocacy to return balance to people of color that got shafted for decades? No, your urgency is laser focused on fixing the relatively recent problems men are experiencing.

If we have limited resources for mitigation of issues, yes, men are in line for those resources too, but the lions share needs to address the greater and more urgent injuries.

How am I, a man that has never been in a position of power anymore responsible for geopolitics than a women that hasn’t been in power? Taring me for being a man for crimes of other men isn’t right.

Tell me about a time where you were in the workplace and saw a woman you work with be treated less than a man, and you stood up and said "that isn't right". What actions have you taken against domestic violence against women? You can't continue to benefit from your position of power letting others being repressed, and claim no responsibility when you have benefited.

But again you are passing the responsibility and making excuses. No one is denying men have done bad things. But accepting men have also being on the receiving end of bad things just for being men, or just in general, is important.

"Yes yes, women have had it bad for years/decades/centuries, and it continues to be bad for them, but what about me?! Its just now started happening to me now, and NOW its a problem!" This is what your statement sounds like. If you continue to see people rolling their eyes when they hear your pleas this is why.

This is the most kind of the misandry I see. Women doing something and then saying that because white men are in charge they are without fault?

Citation please.

The guys in power don’t have that much power, that don’t stop individuals mistreating other individuals.

Listen, I really hope you're on the younger side because that would excuse a huge chunk of your ignorance. You don't need to be an elected official to be a "guy in power". As a guy, you have power. Are you using it to help those that need it? You need to have some conversations with adult women in your life that are willing to be honest with you. Do you have an adult sister? Can you ask your mother? I don't think you have a fucking clue how difficult it is to be a woman even today with all the improvements in law and social evolutionary change. I could cite statistics to you that even today women are paid less than men even for the same exact work, experience, education, and skill. I could tell you that girls tell each other when they're going on a first date and where, so in case they don't return the police can be called. I could tell you that in a room full of powerful men and a single powerful woman, the woman will be the one expected to "get coffee" or "take notes" while a man is never asked. Do I even need to point out that men are trying to decided if a woman has rights to her own body?

Men face none of that. I've seen lots of this first hand. I know this. I'm a man.