this post was submitted on 24 Apr 2024
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[โ€“] [email protected] 13 points 6 months ago (2 children)

I am finally taking advice from here and getting out of my relationship.

The boyfriend is doing exams. I didn't initiate anything for a few days. Heard nothing from him. Couldn't even fit in a five second text message in his day or a five minute phone call. It's like the relationship didn't exist. He knows how much consistency means to me as I have told him countless times. I understand being busy but totally disappearing off of the face of the Earth and me getting worried is not fun. I thought I was being unreasonable but I have needs and wasn't asking for a lot? My birthday is soon and watch him not even send me a message then as well.

I call him out and explain how I feel (over text but still - he lives kinda far). He replies saying he doesn't have time to deal with me and wants to put the relationship on hold for two weeks until he can see me again in person. Also that if I messaged him, it could only be bare minimum stuff and light-hearted. Great way to make your partner feel like they can't talk to you, particularly when they're constantly anxious! So I am detaching and treating this like a breakup, and then when I see him in two weeks, it will officially be over.

[โ€“] [email protected] 6 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

Exams are serious and it's not as easy as taking five seconds.

it's not easy because he has to stop what he is doing , change his thinking, then try to pick up where he left off

I suggest you , or he, set a time, the same time, everyday or every second day , so he can plan around it.

also, waiting for calls to come all day because it's random sucks, it creates worry

set a time so you can stop worrying

How would you have coped before telephones? You had to trust.

big hugs

[โ€“] [email protected] 5 points 6 months ago

he doesnโ€™t have time to deal with me

To me I'd have to say I really wouldn't like that.

it could only be bare minimum stuff and light-hearted.

I wouldn't like that either.