this post was submitted on 12 Apr 2024
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neurodiverse

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What is Neurodivergence?

It's ADHD, Autism, OCD, schizophrenia, anxiety, depression, bi-polar, aspd, etc etc etc etc

“neurologically atypical patterns of thought or behavior”

So, it’s very broad, if you feel like it describes you then it does as far as we're concerned


Rules

1.) ableist language=post or comment will probably get removed (enforced case by case, some comments will be removed and restored due to complex situations). repeated use of ableist language=banned from comm and possibly site depending on severity. properly tagged posts with CW can use them for the purposes of discussing them

2.) always assume good faith when dealing with a fellow nd comrade especially due to lack of social awareness being a common symptom of neurodivergence

2.5) right to disengage is rigidly enforced. violations will get you purged from the comm. see rule 3 for explanation on appeals

3.) no talking over nd comrades about things you haven't personally experienced as a neurotypical chapo, you will be purged. If you're ND it is absolutely fine to give your own perspective if it conflicts with another's, but do so with empathy and the intention to learn about each other, not prove who's experience is valid. Appeal process is like appealing in user union but you dm the nd comrade you talked over with your appeal (so make it a good one) and then dm the mods with screenshot proof that you resolved it. fake screenies will get you banned from the site, we will confirm with the comrade you dm'd.

3.5) everyone has their own lived experiences, and to invalidate them is to post cringe. comments will be removed on a case by case basis depending on determined level of awareness and faith

4.) Interest Policing will not be tolerated in any form. Support your comrades in their joy!

Further rules to be added/ rules to be changed based on community input

RULES NOTE: For this community more than most we understand that the clarity and understandability of these rules is very important for allowing folks to feel comfortable, to that end please don't be afraid to be outspoken about amendments and addendums to these rules, as well as any we may have missed

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Undiagnosed dude here, been accused of it my whole life and people I assume that I have it, yadda yadda

But at every point in my life, I’ve lost people because they grew up while I remained childish. And I guess I’m at that point again, I didn’t want something about my personality I can’t change be the reason I lose people who are important to me

Does this make any sense

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[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago (1 children)

what do you mean by you remained childish?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Talking about the things that really matter to you but have no bearing on everyday life overall

[–] [email protected] 5 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Babe (I hope that's okay to use)

I think that's one of the autism things

I do that, and I gotta say it's not worth the lack of enrichment to keep friends who aren't at some level here to be excited with me about my special interests.

It might make sense to mask it in certain situations like with some coworkers, but you'd be doing a disservice to yourself to not surround yourself with supportive friends.

If it makes you feel better, I'm still working through my shame when it comes to this. I tend to apologize immediately after what I call a "rant" and my loved ones always reassure me that they're here for it lol

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago (1 children)

It describes exactly why I’ve had trouble keeping people in my life in all forms. A point comes and it’s like “Yup that guy just said something extremely socially innocuous and for that reason alone I’m ending the relationship.”

It’s why everyone feels so safe online because they can usually dip without worrying about anything. And it’s why I’ll probably always be physically alone because people like the way I write but they don’t like the way I talk (if that makes sense).

This is why I believe dating apps will never work for me

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I feel like I get this to a degree that makes me uncomfortable. When I tried dating apps, I found that the interactions were so hollow that I never felt like I could be in a relationship with that person.

This is not necessarily advice because I know how hard it can be when it comes to selecting your partner but both of my partners are trans autistic women and that has made a world of a difference.

Sometimes the better option is accepting that some neurotypical people have to work twice as hard to accommodate for some of us, and that's something that is going to make the relationship feel lopsided imo

Maybe I just am too self conscious tho

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago

It’s just like the minute I start putting my foot down people start pulling away