Neurodivergence

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All things neurodivergent and relating to the broader neurodivergent community (and communities).

See also this community's sister subs Feminism, LGBTQ+, Disability, and POC

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It's all "ableism is bad! Support people with mental disorders!"... (beehaw.org)

submitted 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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...until it is someone with narcissistic personality disorder, psychopathy and sociopathy, but mostly NPD.

EDIT: There seems to be some misunderstandings about this post. It is not an attack on this community or the users here, it's just a general vent I have for the type of people that claim to be anti-ableist until it is something they don't like.

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[–] [email protected] 1 points 7 months ago (2 children)

One of my parents is a woman. And she was an abusive woman. But do I hate women? No. That's because I understand that my personal experiences aren't always indicative of the state of the larger world. Now, you probably think the idea of hating women because of an abusive woman parent is ridiculous, and you're right. It's ridiculous because you and I have met many women, and we know that most women aren't abusive. I have also met many people living with NPD, and that's why I know thinking people who suffer from NPD are abusive is ridiculous. But if you've never been to an NPD support group, you probably haven't met a lot of pwNPD, and you probably don't have the directly experienced perspective to instinctively understand what I do. Which is why it's important for everyone to understand the limits of our own experience.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 7 months ago

This is a logical fallacy. Your example doesn't work. Your mother wasn't abusive because she was a woman, so why would you associate her abusiveness with her womanhood? NPD on the other hand directly leads to abusive, manipulative and exploitative behaviour. So in this case NPD is directly associated with abusiveness. And yes, I have met my fair share with pwNPD (or other personality disorders). I have also some experience with being in psychiatric clinics, so I have met many people with various mental problems/disorders.

But all this is not to say that pwNPD are not human beings with their own struggles and needs, too. Obviously pwNPD suffer greatly from their condition and it pains me a lot how hard it is to actually provide support for them. It is a really messed up situation that pwNPD are mostly incapable of self-awareness and (affective) empathy that it is nearly impossible to help them :(

[–] [email protected] 5 points 7 months ago

What makes you think that having NPD parents makes one hate NDPs? I understand where you are coming from but you also need to understand the limits of your own experience. We are all hurt here, if we want to understand and be understood we need to make an attempt. Don't take things as an offence or direct attack to yourself.