parenting

What do your weekly meals look like for you and your fam? I generally enjoy cooking, what I don't enjoy is the negotiations that come with cooking, and with kids, it's even worse. I'm also the kind of person that could eat the same 5 dishes for a year without much fuss or question. That's the ADHD lodged in my brain for you.

The negotiation, or even the anticipation of negotiations, makes me agitated. If I could, I'd be a food dictator, but that's not how living with people works. It's annoying enough to me that I often push it to the back of my mind and just "figure it out" on the fly. That's not conducive to making good choices, though, only convenient choices.

If I'm going to do most of the cooking, I'll want a schedule of meals, so I can both plan, anticipate, and head-off any objections. I struggle with being assertive on this point, and I'm told often, "We don't need to do that much planning." Which, as someone with ADHD into my late 30s, I know is not true, and I do need that much planning if not more. Structure is something I need, and the kids at this age obviously thrive off structure as well.

So anyway, how do you tackle this? I need to get this sorted out for myself, but also for my kiddos. Kiddo 1 just had an annual checkup and is low on iron, and is growing increasingly picky about food. Kiddo 2 is still in that "I'll try anything in front of me." phase, and getting this sorted out now hopefully means I can avoid the pickiness down the line.

I'm going to cross post this in [email protected] & [email protected] as I think it has some clear overlap.

Also why are there no meme templates of fat women? Kinda sucks tbh

But yeah my wife almost melted into a puddle just retelling the story

Folks, how's the fam? How are you?

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Folks, how's the fam? How are you?

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This show is just cool. It's got good vibes, good design, a cool world that feels internally consistent, and good themes. In a world that refuses to understand the weird stuff that exists in it, Helda is curious and empathic to the weird stuff, and tries to understand their motives and desires. She regularly sees the good in things like trolls and other creatures, and makes connections others can't. Her relationships with her friends and mom can be strained at times, but they find common ground and learn to be better friends and family.

My kiddo digs it, and I as well.

Folks, how's the fam? How are you? I'm feeling much better but... Still unclear what I have\had.

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Folks, how's the fam? How are you? I am getting better but, it is unclear what I have wrong with me. 🩹

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Folks, how's the fam? How are you? I am still not well 🤒.

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The parents never hit their child (back), by the way, only she may hit them if she asks, and is allowed to.

Two excerpts that explain the underlying philosophy:

In the world, Nic points out, women are largely on the receiving end of violence, and in his family that was contrasted with his mom, who would teach the kids judo and jujitsu techniques. His aunt was a national judo champion, and the best judoka in the family. People would come to spar with the family, and they would be paired with his aunt, who is 5-foot-4 on a good day. He grew up seeing pictures of her throwing 200-pound men, their heels flying in the air. Then he would see other people’s families, in which violence was just framed as a negative, end of story.

Margo wants some of Nic’s female relatives’ confidence for our daughter—whether or not she wants to be a martial artist, Margo wants her to be physically prepared for life. Margo has felt so unprepared physically for so many scenarios she’s found herself in, starting with being a young woman in New York City, getting grabbed and groped and followed home and jerked off to on the subway. She wonders how she could have responded differently to all those incidents if she’d had a practice of physical mastery that wasn’t dependent on size or brute strength.

After a lifetime of seeing those dynamics, Nic wants the same thing for his children that he was given: the power to protect themselves and the people around them, and the knowledge to be able to know what does and doesn’t warrant a physical reaction. “I give them a space in the home to practice learning those parts of themselves,” he says, “so if they are in a situation, they are not in that space for the first time.”

“I just want to cultivate children who can protect themselves.”

I like that it involved a girl in this case, but it could also allow boys to still fight eachother as a form of consensual play, and accepting "no" for an answer. Just saying "all violence is bad" can lead to problems down the line when they can no longer control themselves and have zero experience.

Folks, how's the fam? How are you? Sorry for the late thread, I have not been well 🤒.

• 🗨 Join us on Matrix! #parenting:genzedong.xyz (read more here)
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Folks, how's the fam? How are you?

• 🗨 Join us on Matrix! #parenting:genzedong.xyz (read more here)
• 👶 Past parenting threads.
• 📖🌈 Click here to go to the "Story Time" post for this month.

Folks, how's the fam? How are you?

• 🗨 Join us on Matrix! #parenting:genzedong.xyz (read more here)
• 👶 Past parenting threads.
• 📖🌈 Click here to go to the "Story Time" post for this month.

sitting here like suppressing the urge to help when I see him mess up in a way that he will only realise in 5 steps and then reverse them one by one. Very proud of his tenacity though.

I wasn't really sure what to title this, this is just a vent post if anything.

Today is the first day of school where I work, It's generally a good day for the kids, plenty of activities and not a lot of hitting to books, just time to reconnect with friends and ease into the year.

Every year they have bouncy houses, and every year they are provided by the Army National Guard. They have guys out here in their uniforms, and their big ass truck that screams, "FREE TUITION" on the side.

I remember having recruiters hassling me near the end of High School, but man, middle school? Now, I don't know if these folks are hanging back and simply supervising, or if they're actually chatting up the kids about the National Guard. I'll tell you, I'll be priming my kids to tell them to buzz off when they're entering this grade level.

Folks, how's the fam? How are you?

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The kid supposedly just walked up and punched my kid in the cheek in class, and chased them with scissors just a few days ago (corroborated by the teacher).

I know shit happens, and they're a resilient kid, so it's not too big a deal. But I also want to raise hell to get this kid away from them. What's the next incident going to be?

I understand the structural and societal issues here - the kid probably doesn't have a great home life, and the school doesn't really have anything they can do that will help him.

Idk, just feeling conflicted and looking for thoughts.

I have been investigating this but several sources expose different dates ranging from 6 months old to 3 years old.

Wanted to check with you all for a recommendation.

In one of Parenti's talks he refered to his son (who was still a babe at the time) as a "Red Diaper Baby". I thought it was amusing. Just trying it out.

Anyway folks, how's the fam? How are you?

• 🗨 Join us on Matrix! #parenting:genzedong.xyz (read more here)
• 👶 Past parenting threads.
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This topic comes up somewhat regularly here. If you have kids, what can you do to at least give them the best shot at understanding and embracing your communist / Marxist / dialectical materialist views? We usually come up with a couple big picture ideas, but over the last few weeks I've been jotting down very specific, concrete actions you can take. This list is not meant to exhaustive - I'm hoping you all have great ideas to share, too. But this is what I've come up with so far:

(And to clarify something, I'm 100% convinced to do need to be somewhat intentional and didactic about your values and views if you want your kids to share them. To think "I'm just going to let them find their own way, I don't want to influence them" is 1,000% lib shit. I'm not even sure most liberals think that way.)

Be a good parent: This one seems obvious, but it's so important it bears repeating and should be at the top of the list. You should be a good, involved parent for a number of reasons anyway. But, if you want your kids to share your views, being a good parent is the #1 way to encourage that. Or at least, being a shitty parent is a surefire way to make sure your kids rebel against everything you care about

Get organized: Get involved in an org, even if it's something like DSA. It can be an actual org like PSL or even just helping feed homeless folks in your town. Your kids can see how you have a great grasp of reality thanks to materialism, which might make them inclined to think you know what you're talking about. But if they know you see the problems in the world, but aren't doing anything to change that world... I can see how some kids might see that as kinda hyprocritical.

Learn history, especially from a materialist perspective: This is easy for me because I love history, even long before I was a Marxist. But if you don't enjoy history, I think you should at least push yourself and try to understand at least the materialist history behind what your kids will learn in school (so for American kids, making sure you understanding things like how the constitution was formed, how African-Americans have been held down throughout history, etc.). Especially if you are American, this is easy because most Americans are dumb as shit when it comes to history, and K-12 history teachers aren't much better. If your kids see that you know what you're talking about, they will largely trust your analysis. So when your kid hears in class that "the US fought the Korean War because the Soviets wanted to take over", they will know to come to you and ask if that's true - because they know you likely have a much more thorough and accurate answer.

For little kids, read history books to them: Right now my kid loves Nelson Mandela, because we have a couple books about him. I happen to believe that fostering a love of history can definitely help point kids in the right direction (even if by itself it probably won't turn them commie). Just make sure it's "good" history and not just that crap that glazes the founding fathers.

For older kids, engage with them on what they're learning in school: Good idea for all subjects, but especially for the social sciences. Ask questions. Be genuinely interested. While like said above, you need to be didactic but older kids especially aren't going to want to hear you rant about how Stalin saved the world from fascism for 15 minutes every time he comes up. Know when to just ask and listen with them.

Stay on top of current affairs: Keep up with the News Mega! All the stuff I said above about history applies to news & current events.

Play some commie podcasts when you're in the car with them: I feel like I might get push back on this, so let me explain. When I was a kid, my parents had news radio on whenever we were in the car. And even if I didn't understand what was always being talked about, I know for a fact I absorbed a ton of information passively that way. I believe that is a big reason I'm as interested in what's going on in the wider world today. I know we're generally down on leftist podcast but the reality is there's a ton of good content out there.

Try to have answers ready for when kids ask about what you believe: I think especially for younger kids, it's good to have simple answers ready that they can understand. And don't worry about being precisely correct in your response. When your kid asks “are we republicans or democrats?” or “do you vote for republicans or democrats, keeping in mind they may have a hard time understanding a complicated response. Say something like “I vote for whoever helps poor people or immigrants or people who work for a living”. That's much better than trying to explain the drawbacks of electoralism to a 7 year old. Obviously you can be more detailed and precise with older kids.

Try and have leftist adult friends who also have kids: Believe me, I get how hard this. It's nearly impossible to find any broadly leftist parents in my area, much less those who have time for socializing. So this is more of an ideal to try and reach, not a concrete action. But I think having some friends around who share your views - and have kids who can befriend your kids - is very effective. Just hard to pull off.

Push back hard against any transphobia or homophobia: Whether you see it IRL or in media, don't hesitate to be clear with your kids what being LGBTQ is about and that anyone who against LGBTQ rights sucks. I say this because I was raised in an environment very hostile to LGBTQ people. Just the other day, my kid wanted her two Barbie dolls to get married. For a fraction of second, there was that old voice in the back of my head saying "they're too young to understand". But of course they're not, and I explained how of course two Barbies can get married. Kids DO need to understand the validity of LGBTQ identities at a very young age.

If you're white, teaching anti-racism is important: Because if you're white, it's incredibly easy to fall into the trap of "well I'm not racist and no other white people I know are racist, so racism must be over". It's easy because white society pushes this notion so hard. You absolute have to teach kids about systematic racism and how they actually do need to stand up to racist pricks, because they will encounter them.

That's the list I have so far, would love to hear your additions.

Hey folks, how's the fam? How are you?

Feel free to join us on Matrix: #parenting:genzedong.xyz. Learn more here.

Hey folks, how's the fam? How are you?

Feel free to join us on Matrix: #parenting:genzedong.xyz. Learn more here.

Hey folks, how's the fam? How are you?

Feel free to join us on Matrix: #parenting:genzedong.xyz. Learn more here.