No, you are NTA. There will never be a scenario where you would be. You get to choose your relationship with your father's new family, whether that is all-in or all-out.
Yes and no. You should apologize for the outburst. There are so many levels to autism, so it is hard to give advice on that part, but if you believe that she is doing that on purpose, then you will need to understand what you will build a wall with the rest of your family.
NTA - simply put, no. You said something to your family under a certain layer of trust and it was abused. You have every right to be angry.
That being said, it's just property, and blood should be thicker. Try to forgive for the sake of family, but that doesn't mean you forget.
The gender reveal is another symptom of a bigger problem. I suspect the two of you argued about money many other times; this may have just been the last straw.
Communication and counseling might help. Keep an open mind on what your future holds as you have an innocent girl that will need her father no matter what happens.
My first experience with Linux was in the mid 80s when I was in the service working with AT&T 3B20 and Sperry UNIX servers as an admin. I enjoyed just about every aspect of the OS, but most government, contractor, and civilian jobs required desktop software that Linux either couldn't install or the open source equivalent just wasn't good enough.
Over the many, MANY, years I have kept experimenting with the various desktop environments, but with my current job a large percentage of our servers are Ubuntu or RedHat Linux (although we're being forced to migrate to Windows Servers for many of the same reasons yet again).
That being said, with the ability for many Microsoft Office365 products working well enough as web-apps, my home laptop runs 100% KDE Neon, and with the exception of needing a couple Windows-only programs (which no longer runs on Linux) I'd probably be running KDE Neon on my work laptop as well. If I can ever get Cisco ASDM to work with Wine and/or Bottles, I will be switching over soon after.
The DEs in the last few years are light years ahead, and I am personally very impressed with just how smooth everything works. My hope is to get back to a semi-40 hour work week in a few years and help contribute - not as a programmer, but perhaps as a QA tester or the like.
Hello from Waukesha WI! IT geek, amateur (HAM) radio operator, husband, father, and grandfather.
Not sure why he thinks he deserves two days per year. Just because you live in a different country?
Based on his response, I would work out an arrangement where there is a mutual agreement where you both get similar experiences per year. If he expects two Father's Days, then you get to pick another Mother's Day so you get two per year the way you want.
Anything else is selfishness on his part.