this post was submitted on 27 Jan 2024
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Today I Learned

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[–] [email protected] 20 points 9 months ago (2 children)

Today I wish I didn't learn....

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[–] [email protected] 14 points 9 months ago (15 children)

Hmm, now I have concerns after watching this thread unfold. OP created their account 2 days ago and this thread is the only thing they've posted. They haven't even made any comments here or elsewhere.

And, different from the beginning, this thread is quickly becoming just the usual whinging from the bigoted MRA types that hate all women.

This thread feels like it was a setup.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 9 months ago (8 children)

this thread is quickly becoming just the usual whinging from the bigoted MRA types that hate all women.

Where, exactly? Is pointing out men have issues that get ignored (by women and men alike) equal to hating women? Because in 200+ comments i’ve seen maybe 3 or 4 actually hating on women.

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[–] [email protected] 19 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (3 children)

It's especially sticky because "Men's Rights" is a bait-and-switch, ripping off "Men's Liberation."

Men's Liberation is associated with feminist movements, because patriarchy hurts everyone. That's not to equivocate between the extents to which men and women suffer under it (or any group under systemic bigotry), but liberation and egalitarianism would help us all.

So Men's Rights does the thing where it appeals to people with genuine grievances, but offers them a bullshit solution that benefits grifters and people in power. It's not this systemic problem, it's this group of people, and if only we could deal with them, everything would magically fix itself. In this case, "It's not patriarchy, it's not capitalism, it's feminists, and women in general. If only we could get them back in their place, your life would be back on track. So vote for me/sign up for my course..."

So, bringing up the ways in which men also suffer under sexism can kick up some dirt to muddy the waters, intentionally or not. Some will be bad faith actors who just want to shit on feminism. Others will be taking the feminist side on this. And those in the middle, who see things turn toxic, can go any way—but if they stay neutral, or especially move right, then the reactionaries gain some ground.

So I don't know what's in OP's heart. But, at least from way too many fights online, I've found that the best course of action is to assume good faith, and give reactionaries enough rope to hang themselves. They don't have the better ideas, and they don't have the better plans, but they're good at shit-flinging. If you just make a good case, they tend to unmask pretty quickly and fall apart. There's no point trying to convince a die-hard bigot, but you can play to the audience by just making the better case and helping bigots embarrass themselves.

In my opinion, at least, for whatever that's worth. Sorry for the rambling!

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