this post was submitted on 18 Jan 2024
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I want to start wearing clothes that are more feminine-leaning in terms of style, patterns and colors, but I don't want to necessarily wear clothing that is designed for women. I need some help with this because this is entirely new territory for me, and I don't have any kind of support group around me that can help me with this. Are there certain stores that are better to shop at that will help me with this? Online or brick and mortar are fine. If it helps to narrow things down, I'm 37, 5'7", 135lbs with a 28 inch waist. I always wear slim fit, small clothing. I prefer not to spend a lot of money, also :)

Everything I currently wear is masculine-leaning, but I want to find clothes that'll fit my gender fluidity better and make me feel more comfortable. I typically wear casual clothes, but I do get dressed up a couple times a year, too.

Any and all help would be appreciated.

Edit: if my location helps, I live in the Metro Detroit area

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Never have I missed /r/oldhagfasion more than residing your post.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (1 children)

I wish I had seen that subreddit before jumping over here! I love the idea of me being an old hag

[–] [email protected] 2 points 9 months ago

It was honestly the most positive community on the site. I didn't participate but the good energy was infectious. Hopefully we can get something like over here someday.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Consider trying thrift shops, like Goodwill, especially if they have fitting rooms. A resale place, like Plato's Closest or Buffalo Exchange, might work too. They have clothes from so many different shops and brands all in one place. Keep in mind that some are better than others, so you might want to shop around.

The lady's section tends to have more interesting options, so take a look and grab a few things that appeal to you and try them on. Some might not fit great but others can be good. I've found quite a few things this way.

If you feel there might be some awkwardness shopping in the lady's section, in my experience people usually mind their own business and the employees are too busy stocking the shelfs to care.

Also, the cost is generally lower and they regularly have 50% off deals, so it's low commitment.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 9 months ago (1 children)

I will try thrift shops! Being in the lady's section can be so overwhelming with all the variety they have, and the last thing I want to do is make someone uncomfortable or draw too much attention to myself.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Nah, they don't care. If anything, they'll be happy you seem to be looking for androgynous, simple women's clothes to wear yourself instead of being a trendy thrift-flipper.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 9 months ago (1 children)

What about bathing suits? I typically wear square cut briefs, but is there something that might present better?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 9 months ago

My androgynous friend wore a swim t-shirt and swim shorts. Definitely cover your chest. :P

[–] [email protected] 2 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

Cardigans, v-neck or scoop-neck shirts, shoes like Vans (the flat ones) or Toms, capris, no-show or ankle socks