Me burning to death fixing pylint warnings before I can commit my code.

Why is the wrong version always the one that is posted.

The (in my eyes) correct (and iirc original) version is:

• Git commit
• Git push
• Get out*

*as someone pointed out (and I remember it as well, but thought I rembered it wrong and corrected it, shame on me in this context) the last point may be originally "git out"

Merge conflict

i read a reddit post years ago where a someone wrote a script that iterates through all the projects in their dev folder, for each project creating a new branch, committing and pushing.

they then aliased it to "fire" or "panic" or something like that.

not a bad idea really

Slight correction. In case of fire:

Git checkout -b firemyusername Git commit -am="fire" Git push.

We don't want to have conflicts with code versions when going in on a rush, better to create a new branch. We can merge all the conflicts afterwards.

Cause of death: 15 minute long pre-push hook

In case of

Git commit

Git push origin main --force

Fire

*git out

git fire

What about git add?

Counterpoint: Virtualized environment/remote desktop. The real computer is in a data center hundreds of kilometers away with world class fire suppression systems.

Counter counterpoint: If you're virtualized you might be working from home, in which case, that's rough, hope they manage to restore your house.

Mark this shit NSFW. I could have viewed it at work.

And if your git repo is self-hosted on-prem, you'd better be helping pack it and carry it out.

no changes added to commit (use "git add" and/or "git commit -a")

I've got something similar on my office door that reads

In case of fire git commit -a git push git -tf out

First, git checkout -b omgFire, then do the rest.

This is a lawsuit waiting to happen. Anyway any of you ever heard of ACID? Why aren't our undo buffers durable and integrated with version control? Squash and forget the individual keystrokes as soon as an actual commit is made.

If the flames are nearby I would be so reckless and execute git push --force.
I don't want to die for a merge conflict.
But maybe then the team will burn me later.

Sorry to be that guy but I don't think it's smart to put this anywhere in public, keep this shit somewhere private as a joke

Commit message: It's lit🔥🔥🔥