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[–] 37 points 3 years ago

At some point parents just say, "Fuck it. Want to fall on your head? That's you."

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  • [–] 26 points 3 years ago (11 children)

    How did that even happen? It looks like some invisible force yeeted the baby to the side?

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  • [–] 47 points 3 years ago (7 children)

    Have you met babies? They are eating, pooping, suicide machines.

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  • [–] 11 points 3 years ago (4 children)

    It sure seems that way! Have you heard of that game where you have to constant try to prevent the baby from suiciding lol??

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  • [–] 16 points 3 years ago* (3 children)

    Yeah I lived through that simulation with my daughter up to age 3.

    Edit: loved to lived

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  • [–] 20 points 3 years ago (1 child)

    In a fit of rage, she threw her self back in preparation for a rolling tantrum without anything to catch her.

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  • [–] 3 points 3 years ago

    It's like a toddlers oldest instinct, just flex all of the back muscles and fly backwards. I'd be sitting on the floor with my son, tell him to stop throwing toys, boom, head hits the floor.

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  • [–] 14 points 3 years ago

    Toddler Crackhead Energy +physics. She flexed her back pretty suddenly. Toddlers are pretty top heavy, and that arm rest is kinda rounded, so... flop, thunk.

    The momentum kept the head out of harm's way, though, so that's nice.

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  • [–] 13 points 3 years ago (1 child)

    This is some proper: fuck you, I'll do what I want behaviour!

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  • [+] -15 points 3 years ago (8 children)

    Either his wife is black or bro got cucked

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  • [–] 10 points 3 years ago (7 children)

    Imagine even thinking this, let alone saying it. Paris would melt your tiny racist brain, you fuckin degenerate

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  • [+] -10 points 3 years ago (6 children)

    Geez buddy I’m sorry you got cheated on and left to raise another man’s kid

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  • [–] 2 points 3 years ago (3 children)

    My wife and I made a conscious decision never to have kids.

    A) Because it's the most environmentally damaging thing you can do and

    B) If they were starved of oxygen at birth, then inhaled too many traffic fumes, they'd post comments like your infantile gobshite

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  • [+] -8 points 3 years ago (2 children)

    I feel like I’m speaking to ChatGPT doing an impersonation of a stereotypical aging white redditor

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  • [–] 2 points 3 years ago (1 child)

    Dude. You can't win this one. Just do what normal people do and take the loss and move on with your life.

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  • [–] -1 points 3 years ago

    And what exactly do I lose? The approval of some miserable fuck who I would never want to associate with anyways? Like I give a fuck about a few downvotes from a pile of cucks

    Also you telling me to move on is rich considering you’re replying to a 4 day old comment

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