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submitted 1 day ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
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[-] [email protected] 114 points 1 day ago

Come on, work being the sole source of community is the problem here. What are we even talking about?

[-] [email protected] 27 points 1 day ago

Yes, but it's also the most logical place. What other activity do you dedicate so much time to? Maybe sleeping but it's hard to build a community around that.

[-] [email protected] 36 points 1 day ago

According to my kids, candies are the most logical place to get most your nutritions from. Where else could you get so many calories?

If most of your time at work is spent socializing, couldn't you cut your work time and build your community elsewhere?

If most of your time at work you spent on honest hard-work working, how much community are you really building?

Cut you calories. Life doesn't happen at work.

[-] [email protected] 5 points 22 hours ago

Eh, I became a stay at home mom over the pandemic, and while I've never worked in an office, but on the shop floor, I do miss the shenanigans. But its almost like a trauma bond, where its like, hey, we're all stuck here, best make the nest of it and try snd have fun while we are here.

I'm fully isolated now, and at this point terrified of crowds, when i never was before.

Not arguing at all people who can work remotely shouldn't, they should, for a litter or reasons. But I do miss my coworkers from my employee owned factory where culture was held in high standard. Im also not arguing this should be the only place one finds community, I'm only saying, for a person like me, it helped sometimes to joke around on the new guy or collectively bitch about issues at work or hear other folks problems and offer advice or help when I could.

We socialized outside of work too. I can't get invited to a party, or a wedding, or anything if I literally don't know anyone. I've only ever known how to make friends in structured environments. But that's wierdo me.

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[-] [email protected] 15 points 1 day ago

It would be logical to work less and get our own community. A lot of people work hard all their lives and die soon after retirement. That's not logical.

[-] [email protected] 6 points 22 hours ago

Quality over quantity.

Great places to socialize are sports-clubs, social-clubs, volunteering, activism, religious communities...

I'd much rather spend five hours a week distributed over two or three occasions with people i share interests with, than with people i share work with. Meanwhile at work i am mostly engaged in small talk, that is quite repetitive as i see the people every day and i have to guard what i can say and what i cannot say more than in other circles.

[-] [email protected] 2 points 18 hours ago

Being back mandatory poker nights!!!

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[-] [email protected] 40 points 1 day ago

They're not distinguishing "remote work" from "working from home" which are two entirely different things. There are whole communities of remote workers who meet and work together around the world. I guarantee you that remote working men who take advantage of these kinds of environments have a better sense of community than men who are forced to go sit in a cubicle with a group of people like the cast of The Office with less sense of humor.

[-] [email protected] 16 points 21 hours ago

what is this study? why does the article not link to it and the data? what is the sample size, located where? waste of time post, downvoted.

[-] [email protected] 77 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

I know this a gross oversimplification, but:

"Remote working benefit those with a reason to stay home, but doesn't for those who don't have a reason to stay home" seems to be the general idea of the headline.

edit: I think this is the study they're talking about, please double check the source before quoting: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/36718392/

[-] [email protected] 26 points 1 day ago

This was also my experience during the main sweep of the pandemic. It was so great getting to cut the commute and be home. Something I have luckily managed to largely continue. Prior to the pandemic my kid was in daycare pretty much 7:30-5:30 so it was really nice to not have to do that, plus during our lockdown we used to go for a family walk at lunchtime.

While some of the single guys I worked with hated staying home and were straight back in the office the moment they were allowed.

[-] [email protected] 14 points 1 day ago

Yeah I went 3 months without having a single face to face conversation with someone, it was pretty shit even with online gaming and discord.

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[-] [email protected] 52 points 1 day ago

Oh, yes! I sure do miss that community made up of ass kissers and people who are just as miserable as I am! Or those 2-3 chill people with whom I meet for a chat weekly anyway, outside work hours because I sure as hell ain't in the mood for socialising while I'm wasting (at least) a third of my day and life doing busiwork for someone else!

[-] [email protected] 29 points 1 day ago

I’m not going to deny that some people enjoy going to work and enjoy interacting with their coworkers, but this feels like it’s missing the forest for the trees. What about the affects commuting has on one’s civic engagement in their actual community?

“There’s a simple rule of thumb: Every ten minutes of commuting results in ten per cent fewer social connections. Commuting is connected to social isolation, which causes unhappiness.” https://archive.ph/2020.02.27-211238/https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2007/04/16/there-and-back-again

[-] [email protected] 3 points 16 hours ago

I broadly agree, but I think there's a bit of a "correlation is not causation" effect at play, too

I would expect people who are very career-focused would prioritise socialising less, and also be more willing to do a long commute for a job they are highly invested in. But the reduced socialising wouldn't necessarily be caused by the commuting (not entirely, at least).

[-] [email protected] 7 points 22 hours ago

I've always thought that researchers should plot outcomes against commute times.

[-] [email protected] 25 points 23 hours ago

In office, I'm a chatty bitch. I have a habit of maybe over-socializing. For sure, my productivity goes down in the office. Oh, and people listen to me just as much WFH as they did in the office when it comes to work stuff.

At home, I can just turn on some music and focus on what I need to get done. I can work on my 20+ jira points I have every god damn sprint. Meetings (ad-hoc or planned) already cause delays for me and I'm already working to much (the highest so far, has been a 16-hour day).

I don't miss the 'sense of community' because there isn't one. Plus, most of my co-workers live in different states, and many in different countries. There's no in-person collaboration even if I'm in the office. It's still everything done over chat/video call.

My company, like so many others, went back on everything they said about WFH. They used to say how great it was because they could find talent from anywhere instead of being arbitrarily constrained by location. Like, obviously, the best talent doesn't just happen to live next to you. Then it moved to hybrid, for those all important in-person, face-to-face collabs and synergy and all the other bullshit LinkedIn BS you can spew. And now, they're doing RTO full on and even shaming those who work from home or would want to. Full-on bully tactics in meetings too. Even started shaming the upper mgmt, because their excuse was "well, other companies are doing it" so I hit back with the "if other companies were committing fraud, would we?" a spin on the "well if everyone else was jumping off a bridge, would you" I grew up hearing all the time. I actually brought that up in a corporate meeting, they never responded, so I'm taking that as a yes.... yes they would and will, so long as they figure they can get away with it (or the penalties don't outweigh the profits).

And then I find out Tim Walz (Minnesota Governor) is also for RTO... so I emailed his office, letting him know just how utterly disappointed in him I was, and to not expect my vote ever again.

Sorry, I'll get off my soapbox. I'm just truly passionate about this. WFH, I'm far less miserable on a day-to-day basis. Working in the office, I was in multiple car accidents going to and from work (none of which I caused). I've been in exactly 0 since WFH. No longer spending 1-2 hours a day just traveling, so I can work remotely, in an office. If I ever win the lotto, I'll be rich enough I could run for president and one of my pillars would be pushing businesses to utilize WFH if the position can do that. Fewer cars on roads, means less congestion for those who have to be onsite. There should be a noticeable decrease in vehicle-related accidents and fatalities.

[-] [email protected] 7 points 21 hours ago

Ownership will abuse labor as much as it can. Sometimes to make more profit. Sometimes for murkier reasons. I think some management are just stupid and they'd hurt the company to follow their unfounded feelings.

Labor should organize.

[-] [email protected] 15 points 21 hours ago

Nah there's no propaganda that will get people to think working in the office every day is in any way better to having freedom again

[-] [email protected] 14 points 21 hours ago

For a lot of disabled people it’s remote work or starve to death.

[-] [email protected] 46 points 1 day ago

Can't wait until we figure out that improving society for the people in it, improves society overall.

[-] [email protected] 30 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

i'm skeptical of any study that concludes anyone would rather deal with all the bullshit of working in the office rather than wfh

no one goes to work for the "community," which can also be gotten literally anywhere other than work

sounds like something corporate slavedriving senior executives decided they wanted a "study" on to prove people want to work in the office

[-] [email protected] 1 points 14 hours ago

which can also be gotten literally anywhere other than work

Can it? For absolutely everyone, regardless of (mental) health? No one benefits from being monetarily pressured to interact with people even if the interaction is only surface level?

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[-] [email protected] 4 points 20 hours ago

no one goes to work for the “community,” which can also be gotten literally anywhere other than work

I can confidently say that a lot of my coworkers do go to work for a sense of community and also hang out with those same coworkers after hours. They basically get to see their community at work, and most of them don't have a home office set up, so the office is a better setting for them.

I separate work and home life almost entirely, and love working from home, but do want to acknowledge that some people do want to be in the office and it isn't only the toxic ones.

[-] [email protected] 2 points 14 hours ago

Fathers versus childless men, rather than husbands vs unmarried men. Telling.

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[-] [email protected] 17 points 23 hours ago

They miss the sense of community because we no longer have 3rd places to hang out. For those unaware:

The Great Places Erased by Suburbia (the Third Place)
https://yewtu.be/watch?v=VvdQ381K5xg
https://youtu.be/VvdQ381K5xg

[-] [email protected] 23 points 1 day ago

I'm childless and all I can say is fuck community.

[-] [email protected] 5 points 22 hours ago

Dude what? It was a great show!

[-] [email protected] 5 points 22 hours ago

I'm sorry to hear this. What makes you say this?

[-] [email protected] 16 points 1 day ago

Stop the fuck with "sense of community" and other crap.

[-] [email protected] 24 points 1 day ago

I'm starting to understand that many people never felt the sense of community, in the workplace or otherwise. Yes it's possible.

The trick is that it doesn't depend on the company, it depends on the people. Last time it happened to me, we pretty much all quit together because we were frustrated at the company but kept being friends afterwards.

[-] [email protected] 6 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Not everyone hates life like you do. I hang out with co-workers all the time. Kept relationships will after I'm done.

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[-] [email protected] 8 points 1 day ago

romcom idea: childless man has crush on childed man. he's raring to come back to work to hang out with hot dad man, but the latter is forced to work remotely.

the whole plot swivels around how they get around the lack of opportunities to be together.

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this post was submitted on 16 Jun 2025
485 points (92.6% liked)

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