this post was submitted on 30 Apr 2025
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[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 hours ago

"You have a beautiful brain" while looking at MRI pictures of my head.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 hours ago

-Omg your dick is huge!

-T-thanks.

That was a good dream.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 22 hours ago

Being complimented by the urologist on my shaving for a vasectomy.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 day ago (1 children)

My female colleague told me the other day I'd make a great dad because my tattoos are all black and white and that would be great for kids because they could color them.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 9 hours ago
[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 day ago (2 children)

"Whoever did your circumcision did a really good job." :/

[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 hours ago

Yeah. Let's see the model cock, sir

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 day ago

I need more context 😭

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 day ago (1 children)

As I was sitting at my desk with some tea and a stroopwaffel, one of my coworkers commented that I "really knew how to live."

[–] [email protected] 4 points 9 hours ago

Average dutch person

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 day ago (1 children)

"You have the most beautiful intestines!" And several other similar things as I was checked for cancer.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 day ago

It's like the saying goes: true beauty is on the inside.

[–] [email protected] 78 points 2 days ago (7 children)

Just last week, someone left a note for me saying I'm a "goddess among mortals" for making a carrot cake without raisins.

I'm an overweight 40-year-old man with a beard. She hadn't seen who made the cake, so she was just making a guess that the baker was a woman, but still. Funny experience.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 day ago (4 children)

Who the fuck puts raisins in a carrot cake?
I have honestly never experienced an abomination. Not that there is anything wrong with raisins, but in carrot cake?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 day ago

This is standard in US-style carrot cakes

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 day ago

Raisins in cinnamon rolls is the true crime

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Most carrot cakes I've had contained raisins. I don't think it's chiefly an American thing but it definitely seems common enough.

I hate it. Anything that dramatically breaks up the texture of a food like that is a culinary mistake.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 day ago (1 children)

The recipe I used actually suggested raisins in the cake and walnuts in the frosting. While I don't mind either on their own or in other things, carrot cake is supposed to be creamy and smooth. If I wanted crunch or chew, I'd choose...I dunno, german chocolate or something.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

Walnuts on the frosting is fine with me but a lot of the ones from the shops used to put them in the cake - not so good.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 hours ago

I did also leave the walnuts out because my son is allergic, so there's that. But left to my own devices, I'd rather have the walnuts on the side.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 2 days ago

Embrace the joy, Goddess.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 day ago

I’m 38, male, chubby, can’t grow a beard for shit.

Raisins are wank. You’re “a goddess among mortals”.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 day ago

She is correct. You are absolutely divine for excluding raisins, you radiant goddess, you!

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[–] [email protected] 45 points 2 days ago (7 children)

"You eat rice like Chinese person"

From the lady behind the counter as I was watching some bullshit on my phone and eating mapo tofu

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 day ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 day ago

there was a comment thread where there was something along the lines of "when my roommate peed you could HEAR how his urethra was wider than a normal person" and I don't know how to feel about it

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 day ago

This is disturbing

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Several nurses have commented on my veins. Like to the point where I felt like I was getting hit on.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 23 hours ago

I had a teacher once that got turned on by veins. I found out after graduating because I met her at a bar and she was horny as hell from seeing my forearms. I use to climb a lot so veiny arms are part of the deal. So, a compliment about my veiny forearms was... special.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 day ago

they just do that sometimes, it's normal
source: dad was a nurse

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I don't know how weird it is but I've been told a few times that I have a "calming presence". It's a very nice compliment, just don't understand why or how.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 day ago (2 children)

This is sometimes what happens when someone grows up around someone who is volatile or unpredictable.

Natural adaptation.

Could that be why?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Oh. Well that tracks, yeah.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 day ago

Baseball, huh?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 day ago

I'm in this picture and I don't like it

[–] [email protected] 36 points 2 days ago (2 children)

"If your humor was a person I would fuck it"

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[–] [email protected] 33 points 2 days ago (7 children)

That I have a nice phone number.

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[–] [email protected] 27 points 2 days ago (3 children)

An ultrasound tech once told me that I have a cute spleen.

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[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 day ago

Irish people ask me what part of Ireland I’m from. I must do an amazing Irish accent despite being Scottish and have never visited there. I blame the fact that central Edinburgh doesn’t have a strong Scottish accent and lots of Londoners/Americans study here.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 2 days ago

"You like like a modern interpretation of some Greek god of spice" I had a spig of rosemary tucked behind my ear and a shirt that reads "why so salty"

[–] [email protected] 22 points 2 days ago (1 children)

From my ENT: You've got a very well maintained nose.

Uhm, thanks?

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 day ago

“I can tell you’re not a habitual cocaine user”

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