this post was submitted on 29 Mar 2025
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[–] [email protected] 61 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Let me guess.

A bunch of kids who have never seen COBOL before use AI to rewrite it all into a language they also can't read, do the bare minimum of checks, and then run millions of payments through it.

This from the genius bar whose hard drive "overheated" when they ran a query on 60,000 records.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 days ago

It does sound a bit like creating plausible deniability for some sketchy transactions later on.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 2 days ago

Ugh that overheated shit pisses me off. Everyone decided they can just make up whatever they want and there will be no repercussions for flat out intentional lies. So annoying.

[–] [email protected] 95 points 3 days ago (4 children)

"If it ain't broke, break it."

Motto of the Department Of Ultra Cool High Efficiency.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 days ago

If it ain't broke, fix it till it is!

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 days ago

I see what you did there with the acronym. Lol

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I'm stealing this. I'll credit you if I remember. (I won't... You'll just be "someone on Lemmy")

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 days ago

My proudest achievement! 😁

[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 days ago (1 children)

So no one will get their checks and those of us still paying in will never be able to prove how much and won't matter we will never get those checks. Yet they will keep pulling the funds from our checks.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 3 days ago (2 children)

I used to teach ESL to some banking IT people, COBOL programmers whose skills were still in demand half a century after COBOL came out. Because the banking systems written half century ago still work, and when it comes to handling other people's money, breakages, mistakes and downtime are absolutely not an option.

If Musk really wanted to run government like a business, he'd do like the banks and leave a working system damn well alone.

Of course, he wants to run government like one of his businesses, into the ground like Twitter or soon Tesla.


PS The only bank they knew of implementing newer tech for handling the money was a brand new one with no existing systems the new tech might break.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Exactly. IT folks know most large legacy businesses run on legacy code. The businesses do change the old code due to the risks.

I believe Elon thinks his team can do it. I believe he is wrong.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 days ago

It took the DOT over 20 years to migrate their port of entry truck tracking system from COBOL to Oracle (god help them). That system is much simpler than social security.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Reminds me of when I worked on satellite c&c and the operating system was from the 1970s. I asked why they kept using such an ancient system and my boss said reliability was far more important than performance or optimization. It had a proven track record and on-site support calls for satellites were very expensive.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 days ago

I remember seeing a doc about Wall of Death motorcycle riders. The bikes they used? Century-old 1910 Indians.

Why? Because when lives depend on it, you want a solution with the absolute fewest possible things that can go wrong. Not the latest fancy thing with all the bells and whistles.

[–] [email protected] 101 points 3 days ago (3 children)

These dumb fucks are going to have blood on their hands. I hope they all catch a bullet

[–] [email protected] 36 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Soon or later they will. I just hope it is more soon than later.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I remember some years ago outcry about platforms offering hitman services for bitcoins...

[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 days ago

They did pardon the founder of a service like that recently…..

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 days ago

I never wish death on anybody. But I wouldn’t be in a hurry to capture the assailant

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

Sic semper tyrannis

[–] [email protected] 37 points 2 days ago

He's going about it all wrong. Make the new system run parallel to the old system, THEN take the old system down. This is being done wrong on purpose.

[–] [email protected] 58 points 3 days ago (1 children)

This is absurd, they have no business doing this.

[–] [email protected] 39 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Break it, privatize it, squeeze for every penny. That's their business.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 days ago

Democracy should give a ROI

[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 days ago

Musk remains true to his Disney villain character and I stand by my previous wish for his fate to be:

...eaten by hyenas. Preferably hyenas he had recently betrayed to save his own skin.

At the rate were going were going to get the bad ending which is:

...Chinese bombers over Washington blotting out the sun.

[–] [email protected] 36 points 3 days ago (2 children)

“Are You Alive Project” targeting what these operatives believe to be improper payments and fraud within the agency’s system by calling individual beneficiaries.

They won't be when you starve seniors to death on the streets, fucking ghouls.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 days ago

The problem isn't the 1% skimming off 90% of the wealth, it is someone's old mom or dad getting a few grand a year.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 days ago

Dead people can’t protest and pressure Congress so it’s a win either way for them

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 days ago* (last edited 22 hours ago)

For my Americans across the pond, I ask earnestly:

What could Russia do today that would cement themselves as an unparalleled oligarchy where just a few people control everything with no regard for anybody else in their country, that the US isn't already doing?

[–] [email protected] 46 points 3 days ago (1 children)

"Hey we said 'rapidly', nobody said anything about it still working when we're done"

[–] [email protected] 30 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Fast, cheap, good. They're going for 1 out of 3.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 days ago

Hahaha, good point. On the other hand, "cheap" depends on the perspective. From Musk's it's an incredibly cheap way to get a big payoff....huge ROI!

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Hopefully, when it’s all broken and nobody’s getting their social security payments, maybe some of them will wake up.

[–] [email protected] 25 points 3 days ago

Well, there goes disability for me, my full time care twin, and my siezure prone full time care sister...

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

This schedule is ludicrous even if they cut all the Agile meetings in half and skip Sprint Grooming altogether.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 days ago (2 children)

I would bet that there will be an "accidental" bug in the code that deletes every single Social Security account.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 days ago

Only those that criticize the government, somehow. “Oops, because of some complicated algorithm, it only affected people who posted the word ‘orange’ on social media recently.”

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 days ago

"Woops! Well, just reapply via this new DOGE chatbot! It rejects applications with a 100% success rate!"

[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 days ago

They'll turn off benefits to people with opinions

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 days ago

Let's hope he makes a backup first

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 days ago (1 children)

We'll just put it all in one giant table. Think of the space savings!

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 days ago

Document databases are the future /s