Three guys wearing a red shirt
this post was submitted on 03 Feb 2025
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Honestly if I was a woman any dude in life. Maybe even those goth dudes on black horses. Def the trees tho. They Hott af
My two older brothers and my dad
Figures that the safest men to be stuck with aren't human men.
Aragorn?
He's 87 years old at the start of LOTR.
He descends from Elros the Half-Elf.
He's got Elven heritage. He's the 64th descendant of Elros, brother of Elrond. I think he's also decendend from a Maiar as Elros and Elrond's great great grandmother was Melian.
Not if yer a fucken orc!
I tried to come up with a counter argument and realized pretty quickly that I didn’t want to.
What's the counter-argument ? Let's hear it
I mean, they're objectively correct.
I'd choose: Boromir, Ned Stark, and Sean Bean.
No way anything bad can happen to me with those magnets around.
I dunno. Might take Sharpe instead of Ned Stark, good to have someone that knows how to use a rifle
The whole elevator would just crash through the foundation. You'd be collateral when Death gets a 3 for 1 final destination style.
Is the elevator spacious?
I can't believe how jacked Arnold is here. It's truly remarkable.
Arnold's got a decent number of allegations against him, but Andre would protect you so I guess it's honestly a freebie for the other two if he's in the mix.
I don't know; can you name three bears that women would feel safer with?
Barenstain?
Somewhat related: that's a dream blunt rotation right there
I feel like Gimli would hog it, Aragorn would obviously be awesome, and Legolas would be chill but you could tell he's thinking your weed sucks, he's got a much better connection.
Gimli, it's a blunt, not a microphone
The fact that they had to go to fictional characters is significant.
To be fair, being fictional means they're significantly less dimensional than real people and are incapable of holding secrets.
I mean there are real people I feel absolutely safe around, but they're just normal people I know and have built trust with. There are no famous people I can say the same for because I don't know them personally, even if they seem good on the surface. And for fictional characters like these, we "know" Aragorn is safe because he's written to be benevolent, we've read his entire life, and the author's dead so there's no possibility for new material to change that perception.
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Everywhere they went people were getting kidnapped, orcs were invading, trees were coming to life, and the dead were rising. Id want to be far away from that elevator.
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So ackshually...
Aragorn was descended from Elros who was a half-elf, but that was so long ago he may or may not be a full man depending on how racist one is about miscegenation.
Legolas was an elf and Gimli was a dwarf, so explicitly not Men.
How about Eomer and Faramir instead?
Boromir would've made them feel safer.
Faramir didn't try to take the Ring from Frodo, unlike Boromir.
Elros and Elrond had a choice as to become Eldar or Edain. Elrond chose Eldar, while Elros chose Edain. Once they chose their mixed nature was resolved.
Not exactly, since the Númenóreans still had longer lives than Men due to their elven heritage. So while one could absolutely make the argument they were Men, there's also a case to be made saying they weren't pureblooded Men.
one drop
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