this post was submitted on 22 Oct 2024
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childfree

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[–] [email protected] 44 points 5 days ago (1 children)

It still amazes me, when I read these child free articles from across the pond, that the world can be so completely different.
In Sweden a working parent is allowed to stay home to take care of a sick child and get almost 80% of your salary from compensation, statistics from 2022 says that men use 40% of that sick child leave.
It's not 50/50 yet and we still have some "old school" husbands saying they're baby sitting when taking care of their own kids. They are usually shamed about it nowadays though.

When my wife and I are in high energy and do lots of fun stuff we say "Thank goodness we don't have kids, this would've been impossible!", when we are tired, sleeping in and spend a weekend doing the absolute minimum we say the same.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 4 days ago

I grew up in a huge family, and know very well the costs of parenting in terms of time, energy, and money.

And I'm childless and unmarried because I love my peace, quiet, and having (most) of my money. My parents, thanks to that choice, are forced to live off working for DoorDash and begging their kids for help.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 4 days ago (1 children)

When I tell people I don't want kids, the most common responses are: Won't you be lonely? Who will take care of you when you are old?

It seems like to me that a lot of people are having kids just so that somebody can take care of them when they are old. People like that are not very good parents in my experience. And so, even when they are old, their kids barely speak to them and don't take care for them, because they didn't take care of their kids.

I feel like I wouldn't be a very good parent. I value my free time too much and freedom to go whenever and wherever I want.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)

In China, that's exactly why most people have kids. In my experience, very few don't take care of their parents when they're older due to enormous social pressures. Like, you'd have to be an incredibly bad person to not check in on your parents when they're old. So, if they raised you well enough to survive into adulthood and you're not a sociopath, you're not going to let them starve in the street.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 4 days ago

I can’t speak to conditions in Sweden, but this feels like a very adult take on an adult situation. She askes who would trust me with a child? Many Children's mothers find themselves in a situation where maybe their parents shouldn’t have had them, but here we are so lets embrace the lost.