top 50 comments

sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] 161 points 2 years ago (1 child)

Headline: Russian Oligarch Found Dead in Moscow after Falling Out of Window

"Do you know how little that narrows it down?"

  • source
  • hideshow 2 child comments
  • [–] 97 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    You gotta be kidding me. But hey, stick with the classics. If it ain't broke...

  • source
  • hideshow 2 child comments
  • [–] 76 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (2 children)

    The classics are the point. These aren't meant to be secretive killings, the signature is the message.

    They would use a different method if they wanted to obscure responsibility, dispose of the body, or do any number of things differently. Because they didn't, means it was a public signing statement.

    Whether it was intended for one recipient, or many, who's to say. Either way, you can be sure the intended party, or parties, received it.

  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 4 child comments
  • [–] 5 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    These aren't meant to be secretive killings, the signature is the message

    Sure, but would it kill them to spice things up every once in a while?

  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 2 child comments
  • [–] 9 points 2 years ago (2 children)

    It's unfortunate that this method was initially used because it was an intentionally ambiguous method of assassination, whereas now it's a signature assassination, with only a sprinkling of ambiguity for their local media.

    Just think, if they had started with tragic hot air balloon accident, death by misadventure with a jet ski, or pet bear mauling?

  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 3 child comments
  • load more comments (1 reply)
  • [–] 58 points 2 years ago

    Those damn flimsy Russian windows.

  • source
  • [–] 54 points 2 years ago (1 child)
  • That was a grim read. My favorite part:

    Reportedly died by suicide after shooting himself in the chest five times.

  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 2 child comments
  • [–] 53 points 2 years ago

    Oligarch: Putin what is going on with the war? Why are we losing?

    Putin: Oh wow look, an Eagle, just out there, wow majestic plumage, you should come and see...

  • source
  • [–] 43 points 2 years ago (2 children)

    Windows are just so unsafe in Russia, aren't they? I'm never getting near one if I ever go to Moscow.

  • source
  • hideshow 4 child comments
  • [–] 21 points 2 years ago (2 children)

    Windows are just so unsafe in Russia, aren't they? I'm never getting near one if I ever go[ing] to Moscow.

  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 3 child comments
  • [–] 43 points 2 years ago (4 children)

    I'd love to go to Moscow. From all I've seen, it's a beautiful city. I'd also love to go to St. Petersburg and see the Hermitage.

    But not while Putin is in power. Maybe one day when elections are fair and queer people aren't oppressed, but I won't be holding my breath for that happening in my lifetime sadly.

  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 8 child comments
  • [–] 16 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    If I'd outlive the gramps sending us to kill and die, it'd be a pleasure for me to show you and other lemmings around. Russia has many sight to see and adore, to fall in love even, mostly in St. Petes as I'm biased against Moscow. If at any point I'd not be persecuted for printing that comment, I'd gladly do it on the house.

    Peterhoff is one of the most popular tourist destinations there if you want to google some photos. A mansion where every room is designed in it's own royal-tier style to cringe at. And that complex is surrounded with a huge walking park with old trees, marble statues and beatiful fontains, some of them are made to shoot at random from the ground to confuse visitors, all of that sitting right at the shore.

  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 2 child comments
  • [–] 13 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    My dad was invited to a conference in St. Petersburg when it was still Leningrad after Glasnost. He was well-traveled, but talked about how the two most beautiful cities he ever saw in his life were Leningrad and Sarajevo. He openly wept when the latter was destroyed during the war in the Balkans.

  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 2 child comments
  • [–] 15 points 2 years ago*

    Maybe one day when elections are fair and queer people aren’t oppressed, but I won’t be holding my breath for that happening in my lifetime sadly.

    Yeah, work wanted to send me, but I'm not white and also not suicidal window-proof.

  • source
  • parent
  • [–] 3 points 2 years ago

    Oh yes, the avoidance is entirely for governmental reasons. There is so much that would be interesting to see otherwise. Sadly it seems to be a repeating theme in Russian history where some change happens that seems like the ordinary people are finally starting to get some freedom and stability but then some authoritarian gets in power and cracks down on any dissenting views, even minor. I guess outsiders have to catch it during the right window of time.

  • source
  • parent
  • load more comments (1 reply)
  • [–] 20 points 2 years ago (2 children)

    Well. You'd need to avoid windows, tea, people with umbrellas (OK not directly Russian, but soviet era eastern europe), aeroplanes, cars. And if they really want to get you, they'll go old school and use a gun, or perhaps even a missile if you annoy the right people enough.

    I'd just skip Moscow as a whole personally.

  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 4 child comments
  • [+] 33 points 2 years ago* (last edited 1 year ago)
    [–] 22 points 2 years ago*

    Killed by the architects
    ...again

  • source
  • [+] 22 points 2 years ago
    [–] 18 points 2 years ago

    Fuck russia

  • source
  • [+] 18 points 2 years ago* (last edited 1 year ago)
    [+] 18 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)
    [–] 14 points 2 years ago

    Man it's really easy for Russians to fall out of windows. Maybe they should put a warning sticker on them or something.

  • source
  • [–] 11 points 2 years ago

    This is not news, this is just Monday.

  • source
  • [–] 10 points 2 years ago

    Defenestration is Classic Russia.

  • source
  • [–] 10 points 2 years ago

    SWO - Special Windows Operations, a subdivision of FSB

  • source
  • [–] 9 points 2 years ago (4 children)

    Do they kill them, then throw them out the window? Is there a height requirement? Because if they just throw them out - there's a chance they'd survive.

    .... and is it translation thing, because I feel like balconies are probably more common, but maybe they just say window still so we all know the government did it? Idk.

  • source
  • hideshow 6 child comments
  • load more comments (2 replies)
    [–] 9 points 2 years ago

    There should be some kind of safety code in Russia about their windows...

  • source
  • [–] 8 points 2 years ago

    Again...LOL! Bodies of water, staircases, windows and tea are dangerous in Russia.

  • source
  • [–] 8 points 2 years ago

    The Moscow Defenestrator strikes again

  • source
  • [–] 6 points 2 years ago

    Well that's certainly not subtle for a long series of assassinations but we aren't entirely out of the realm of possibility that Russia's 'drunkenly falling out of a window' problem is simply way worse than the western world's and if I recall correctly our's isn't great.

  • source
  • [–] 5 points 2 years ago

    Rich people supporting fascists never think it’ll happen to them

  • source
  • [–] 3 points 2 years ago
    [–] 3 points 2 years ago

    More money for Pooty Poot

  • source
  • [–] 3 points 2 years ago

    The reason you know Hillary Clinton never killed anyone is because modern US republicans actually love murderers.

  • source
  • load more comments
    view more: next ›