Neurodiversity

every day of my life is pain i suck at being social i will say one thing and mean another. i made some friends only to have them taken away from me due the rule saying all teachers are monsters my parents drugged i thought i could trust them i am still living with them when will this pain will only end when i kill myself. then i will be in blissful non-existence i also spend my of most days depressed because of all this