They're not warm blooded. Maybe they're flamingos.

They don’t secrete a filtered blood derived substance through modified sweat glands, thus not milk producing, nearly milk substitute producing.

Wild thought, vampires that drink milk instead of blood.

Neither Coconuts nor Oats have Mammary Exocrine Glands

Behold, a man!

You can milk any animal that has nipples... but, do coconuts have nipples?!

I rest my case 😎

Mammals aren't "living organisms with fur and milk". They're "the most recent common ancestor of the echidna and the cat, and anything descended from that".

Nah, coconuts don't have the right kind of teeth and ear bones.

While "having fur and producing milk" may have been the original description of mammals, biology no longer classifies things that way.

Today, all of the classification is based on Clades, which can be established by doing DNA investigation (similarity matching). So, "mammals" are defined as a clade. And whether somebody falls into it or not depends on their DNA similarity. And coconut clearly do not belong into there.

Geez I thought we left the coconut fuckers back at the place which may not be named.

In this essay I will

coconuts are plants and you're an idiot

gasp!

[ clutches pearls ]

Vegans hate this one weird trick

I agree