this post was submitted on 22 May 2024
402 points (97.6% liked)

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[–] [email protected] 32 points 5 months ago (2 children)

I'd be commissioning shit like wild. Why yes, I would like a portrait of my cats as fine gentlemen. Of course a stained glass goatse would look excellent hanging in the bathroom. Yes, a macaroni art Mona Lisa, did I stutter?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 5 months ago

Your personal assistant would have the craziest address book. "Yeah, I got the number for a guy who works exclusively in the medium of jello. You know he never heard of a gummy Venice De Milo?"

"Fish taxidermy? No, I don't like dead animals. I do have a cybernetics guy that helps give dogs the ability to walk. Upright. Like people. He's cool though."

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 months ago

I'd have to hire somebody just to keep track of all the commissioned works. =D

[–] [email protected] 16 points 5 months ago

Coworker: Hey Abby, we noticed you’ve acting strange lately and we’re all concerned. Abby: I’ll pay you thirty thousand each to drop this.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 months ago

Only slightly related, but I like Stone Cold Jane Austen a lot.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago (1 children)

What is it? An ugly ham? A weird champagne flute? I'm lost.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 5 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 6 points 5 months ago (2 children)

Oh thanks. I've come across the name, never seen one. TIL.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 months ago (1 children)

you obviously live somewhere special. i suggest you start selling corndogs where you are immediately.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 5 months ago (1 children)

France. I fear I'd be driven out of town.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Disneyland Paris sells them for 11 euros. They should be maybe 1.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 months ago

No surprise there. It's a Paris tourist trap prices.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 months ago

Absolutely delicious, I don't even like cornbread and I like corndogs