this post was submitted on 18 Apr 2024
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I would like to know if there is an "official" way to set an account as disabled. For now, I am plan on posting this on Asklemmy, changing my password to some random string that I won't remember, and then logging out. If I'd like to come back later, there's a chance of my account being revived through the "forgot password" process.

I am leaving Lemmy for good. I have spent a few months here, and the first few months were nice and positive. But now it feels much more Reddit-like. Most active communication here is happening at posts that I find negative. All this negative stuff is detoriating my mental health. I'd instead prefer to stay happy and remain ignorant until I personally experience the issues being raised here. 

Of course, a lot of people will disagree with this approach, and they are likely already coming up with comments to post on this thread that I'd find rude and thus negative. But I've seriously had enough of it.

I have a heavily filtered Reddit with a home page filled with people like me. The communities they are part of either don't exist on Lemmy or are not sufficiently active. I will be active with these people until the old Reddit front-end reaches EoL. Please prefer to answer the first paragraph over the rest.

PS: please don't judge me by my comments on my profile. I am a teenager and my personality is still maturing. I cringe at most things I do the next day after doing them.

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[–] [email protected] 33 points 6 months ago (2 children)

Just stop using it? Eesh. No need for the drama, just walk away.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 6 months ago (2 children)

I get wanting to delete old accounts before leaving sites. That’s not really unreasonable.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I get wanting to delete old accounts

They didn't ask that (which, btw, is under settings -> delete account), they asked to disable it.

At the risk of sounding like a Facebook group, this isn't an airport... you don't need to announce departure. Just leave. Voila. Done.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

I wrote a more thorough response explaining why they are getting the reaction they are. I don’t disagree with you about most of their post. But delete, disable, whatever you wanna call it. We all know what they’re asking and it’s reasonable.

[–] [email protected] -3 points 6 months ago (1 children)

It is not unresonable to want to do that, but it stupid to believe that all Lemmy instances will comply with deleteion requests

[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (1 children)

I don’t think they assumed that would be the case, in fact, I don’t think they made any particular assumptions here. Hence why they asked the question: “is it possible?” It’s also probably beneath you to attack someone’s intellect like that just for asking a question on a community dedicated to asking questions.

Most websites have some sort of account deletion/disable feature with varying degrees of thoroughness. You’re acting like this person is asking for the impossible or unreasonable, and I don’t really know why.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 months ago (1 children)

That's fair, I can see how I was too harsh here, sorry OP!

[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I appreciate your hearing me out. I could probably follow your example more often on that front haha

[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I try to be resonable and kind when I feel the argument against me is fair.

I can and have absolutely been an ass when the situation is different though, but for the most part I am just quite mellow (:

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago (1 children)

It is kind of wild how even with how much experience many of us have online and on forums, with all that we know about the social behaviors it brings out, we can still get kind of nasty anyway.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago

That's the anonymity for you, for god and bad

[–] [email protected] 23 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (1 children)

Of course, a lot of people will disagree with this approach

There is not a single person here who is going to talk you out of leaving lmao, whether you stay or go affects no one but you. That being said, you're a teen and you're choosing to leave a social media platform due to mental health reasons. That's quite far from being a bad thing. You're doing what's best for you and that's good shit. You've matured further than you think.

Every Lemmy account will have a Delete Account option located at the bottom of the main page of your settings, not sure if it's automated or if an admin has to go in to clear em out manually, but trigger it, log out and you're set!

[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 months ago

talk you out of leaving

I guess that’s what he want

[–] [email protected] 21 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

I know you’re going to feel like this thread validates how you’re feeling, but I do encourage you to look at it from our point of view: wanting to delete your account for your own mental health/because you aren’t enjoying this site is valid. Nobody can force you to stay or like this place. But a lot of this post seems more like you wanted to soapbox about your concerns under the guise of “help me delete my account.”

Given your title is pretty straightforward and asking for a technical solution, a lot of people are going to come in here out of curiosity or out of a desire to help you. So imagine their reaction when 3/4 of the post is not exactly a manifesto, but certainly a lengthy indictment of sorts that is squarely directed at us, the community, as the problem. We also don’t have context for who or what you’re upset about besides “politics.”

Lines like this one are unproductive and actively poking the bear if your goal is positivity and productive interactions:

Of course, a lot of people will disagree with this approach, and they are likely already coming up with comments to post on this thread that I’d find rude and thus negative. But I’ve seriously had enough of it.

I’m sure there are things in here we all need to hear. And yes, unfortunately Internet forums tend to bring out a little more negativity in people. I am certainly guilty of that at times. But I do urge you to consider what your reaction would be if you stumbled across a post like this yourself.

Also given the number of us who came here because of Reddit’s terrible management and utter disdain for their own users, throwing out that you are leaving here for Reddit is not exactly going to engender sympathy. Especially if your primary concern is quality of conversation, negativity, and politics showing up in every thread.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 6 months ago

As they say, you're not a train or plane, you don't need to announce your departure. I do completely get your complaint about the negativity here, though, it's... a lot. Wanting some distance from that because it's a bummer is perfectly reasonable.

Best of luck in the future.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 6 months ago

Sounds like the solution you are looking for is self control. Nothing but yourself can stop you from just making another account.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 6 months ago

Just to let you know, the whole thing where you look back on every little thing you do and cringe won't magically go away when you're an adult.

That's a self-esteem thing, not a teenager thing.

I guess what I'm saying is that this is one of those things that can get better, but won't just magically get better on its own. It didn't get better for me until I got some control in my physical health (stuff that would affect my perspective) and took agency in my mental health.

If you're in the situation to do so, check out what kind of therapy resources are available to you. You can just try a bunch until you find one that really clicks, and a lot offer free brief consultations.
Many employers offer 4-10 free visits for any immediate family members/offspring, too!

I'm sorry you feel so critical of yourself all the time. Its so draining to live like that.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 6 months ago

I find it interesting that people can have so very different experiences on this network.

Anyway, to delete your user, you'll probably need to do it in a browser instead of through an app. Login to your instance feddit.nl through a browser.

The "hamburger" menu in the top right. Click your username. Choose settings. Scroll down. Delete user.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

To delete an account harken ye

This helpful list of steps three

First upon a color vote

And painteth thy blazon upon thy boat

Hence wilt thou gather thy bow

And find a river quick of flow

Reach heights to raise thy personhood

And aim with care thou ever should

Quickly light thy arrow aflame

And watch the cinders of your fame

Once these steps you have obeyed

No trace of you shall be betrayed

[–] [email protected] 9 points 6 months ago

Pretty sure there is a way to delete an account. Just look in the profile setting.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 6 months ago

There's no way to stop yourself from making a new account

If you really have no self control might be worth getting someone else to put a password on the app (assuming you use it on mobile)

There are browser extensions that can block time wasting sites for you but you'll always be able to disable them

But hey you could always just start being horrendously racist until someone bans you

[–] [email protected] 6 points 6 months ago

Yeah, leaving lemmy for reddit is one of the worst ideas I have ever heard. Leaving social media all together and even going out more would be a great idea though.

In any case, good luck to you. The steps to delete your account have been mentioned plenty so I‘ll not repeat that.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago

git gud scrub! sorry I hate to not meet peoples expectations.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago
[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago

Hey, can I pm you to ask about these like minded comms? Because I think similarly somewhat and wondered where to find places.