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[–] 205 points 2 years ago (61 children)

I know these stories are always fake anyway but holy shit, buy a bike and chill out for a few years.

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  • [–] 62 points 2 years ago (46 children)

    I personally know someone who totaled 4 cars before turning 18. He literally treated the gas as an on/off switch.

    So people that bad at driving are out there.

    Truth be told, drivers here in the US are TOTALLY untrained for the most part. My oldest is currently in driver's Ed and it is a joke, in regards to actually how to drive a car. I have spent a lot of time training him as I have a long history taking racing and advanced driving courses. I've held SCCA and FIA racing licenses and I have taken some courses that are usually reserved for police officers The only problem is I do not feel that I'm a very good teacher for him. But he has picked up some things, even if he isn't up for threshold or trail braking.

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  • [–] 48 points 2 years ago (36 children)

    Most of the USA also seems to lack options for adults to take a class and be given professional instruction on how to drive, for some odd reason. If you're out of high school there are no classes for you.

    I wonder if it's like that in most other countries as well?

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  • [–] 42 points 2 years ago (4 children)

    Yeah, people like this are why my (absolutely spotless record, not even a parking ticket) insurance is so high. They drive rates up for everyone around them, simply due to the fact that you can get hit by them through no fault of your own.

    I dated a girl whose brother had four accidents on his record at the time. He was 17 years old, so just barely old enough to have his license, (in my area you can get your permit at 15, and license at 16). After his second totaled car, their parents told him he was buying his third car with his own money. For them, the first totaled car was a fluke; The second was a pattern. So he got a job at 16, bought a junker with his earnings, and totaled it six months later.

    The worst part is that two of his accidents happened in the exact same circumstances. Slick roads from an ice storm. He takes one particular corner too fast, hits a patch of ice, and ends up totaled. He totaled two cars on the exact same icy corner, because he didn’t learn from the first accident.

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  • [–] 27 points 2 years ago (3 children)

    New intern at work was talking about smashing 2 cars while speeding just weeks apart. Then starts talking about wanting to get a motorcycle. Kid isn't going to make it to 25.

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  • [–] 26 points 2 years ago (5 children)

    Wouldn't they have revoked your license by this point?

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  • [–] 38 points 2 years ago

    Not necessarily. Actual accidents don't always confer citations and many of those can be discharged for simply proving your insurance paid the other person. It's not illegal to be a klutz, it's just expensive.

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    [–] 143 points 2 years ago (5 children)

    Is there any hope for me?

    Yes, public transport.

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  • [–] 121 points 2 years ago (7 children)

    The insurance agencies really need a way to recommend the government take someone’s license when they’re a public danger like this.

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    [–] 113 points 2 years ago

    Keeping people like this off the road is one of the biggest reasons why every place needs robust public transportation systems.

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  • [–] 81 points 2 years ago

    Bro needs a bus pass

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  • [–] 74 points 2 years ago (11 children)

    Sounds like my wife's asshole cousin who has been in so many crashes and totaled so many cars at this point that he's had his license taken away and has to get around Indianapolis on a scooter. And he's in his 20s.

    I remember the day at a family function when the roads were icy him bragging to us about how he made it down to the function doing 80 on icy roads and sliding around everywhere but didn't crash. Seriously, he was bragging about it as if it made him Mario Andretti.

    His dad is a doctor, so I'm guessing he was paying that high insurance for quite some time, but no longer. His dad also bought him a Cadillac which, obviously, he totaled. I love his dad, he's my GP, but he has a big blind spot when it comes to his son.

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  • [–] 27 points 2 years ago (5 children)

    doing 80 on icy roads and sliding around everywhere [...] bragging about it as if it made him Mario Andretti.

    This, at best, makes him kinda okay at Mario Kart.

    But even that game forces you to give up if you crash too many times.

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    [–] 69 points 2 years ago (11 children)

    So best case for someone like this: don't drive. Get other people to drive you, use public transportation, get a bike, etc. But this is probably America and that is 100% not possible everywhere. Or even most places.

    There is another option: State-Owned High-Risk Auto Insurance. These are insurance plans owned by individual states. Because US states all require auto insurance to drive a car and because driving a car is goddamn necessary in a lot of America, this exists.

    It's VERY expensive. Like when I was looking at getting good coverage for 2 newish cars I was staring down $500/6mo. Our state's high-risk was $2,000+. But it exists for people like in the post who are just too expensive for ordinary insurance companies to want to insure.

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  • [–] 15 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (6 children)

    Where on earth are you getting insurance for 2 cars for $500/6 months? I'm middle aged, drive a 10 year old car, and have a perfect driving record, and mine's about $100/month. I've priced the same level of coverage with other companies and that's pretty much what all of them offered.

    Eta: I'm literally asking. I have no loyalty to my current company, if I can get it cheaper, I'm out.

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  • [–] 51 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    Where can I find more humor like this?

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  • [–] 50 points 2 years ago (14 children)

    I actually believe this is a real story

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  • [–] 17 points 2 years ago (6 children)

    If it isn't a real story, there are plenty of real stories like it. There are just a disgusting number of people who are reckless drivers.

    Almost no one in the town I live in uses their turn signals. It's infuriating. I can't tell you the number of times I've almost rear-ended someone who suddenly slam on their breaks in the middle of an intersection and turn off. I also live in a subdivision with no sidewalks and a speed limit of 25 mph. People are regularly walking their dogs and kids are everywhere. I see people flying down the curvy subdivision roads doing at least 50.

    I'm amazed I haven't heard about anyone getting killed.

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    [–] 49 points 2 years ago (50 children)

    I legitimately don't get people who can't drive. It's actually ridiculously simple to not break the law or get in an accident. I've never had a ticket or been in an accident. Closest was I slid on ice and hopped a curb once, but there was no damage at all because, get this, I was driving slow enough for the bad weather conditions :0

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  • [–] 29 points 2 years ago (32 children)

    It’s actually ridiculously simple to not break the law or get in an accident.

    Driving a car is absurdly difficult, incredibly dangerous, takes only a second of distraction to kill yourself and others and in general is such a nightmare that it is contrary to what you say a miracle that people aren’t crashing into each other all the damn time.

    Like, everybody I have gotten in a car with for the past 10 years invariably will get stressed out significantly by the unavoidable chaos of driving enough to visibly become emotional about it even during a short drive. Driving is miserable.

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  • [–] 20 points 2 years ago* (4 children)

    I legitimately don’t get people who can’t drive.

    Setting aside folks with serious disabilities, folks with long term mental decline, folks with mechanical difficulties, folks with rambunctious kids in the back seats, folks in neighborhoods with high speed limits and generally unsafe driving conditions, folks who have to drive through inclement weather, folks who don't regularly maintain their car's brakes and tires, folks who drive cars that have poor visibility (big trucks, particularly), and folks who just never learned rules of the road before getting a rubber stamp from a DMV that does not give a shit...

    It's difficult to understand why other people don't drive as well as I do.

    One sec. Sorry. Banging this out on my phone while driving and I had a whoopsie-doodle. Let me clean this up and I'll finish my post.

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    [–] 40 points 2 years ago (6 children)

    Maybe you should learn how to fucking drive?

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    [–] 39 points 2 years ago (7 children)

    My suggestion would be to:

    • Move to a place where not driving is a viable way of getting about. If you already live there, great!
    • Get a lifetime transit pass and consider getting a bicycle
    • Ditch your car and never look back
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    [–] 39 points 2 years ago

    Never thought I'd take the side of an insurance company.

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  • [–] 35 points 2 years ago (11 children)

    I got quoted $840 a month for insurance. Clean accident history. Insurance is bullshit levels of expensive.

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    [–] 35 points 2 years ago

    The best insurance company for this person is take the bus.

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  • [–] 35 points 2 years ago (2 children)

    Have you tried reducing your alcohol consumption?

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    [–] 30 points 2 years ago

    As your attorney I advise you to buy a bus pass.

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  • [–] 26 points 2 years ago (7 children)

    How tf do you even get a water bottle under the brake pedal?

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  • [–] 21 points 2 years ago (3 children)

    It can be done. I drove Uber part time and a group of girls in the back decided why not drunk water bottle fight. One rolled under as I was going downhill. That is up there with one of the most terrifying moments of my life.

    I used the emergency brake and stomped the foot brake as hard as i could multiple times until it was crushed then fished it out.

    I no longer drive Uber part time.

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    [–] 25 points 2 years ago

    Sounds like someone should have their license revoked.

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  • [–] 24 points 2 years ago (3 children)

    So, basically, he had one accident per year. And he is not smart enough to understand that the universe is trying to tell him "Don't drive a car, then!"

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    [–] 24 points 2 years ago

    This guy is the reason all of our rates go up.

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  • [–] 20 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    Sure, keep driving like that, with some luck you kill a person. Fr walk, use bicycle or bus before that happens.

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    [–] 19 points 2 years ago (4 children)

    this is markets working. this is why we want police to have to carry insurance.

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    [–] 16 points 2 years ago

    I don't think car insurance is your biggest problem

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