this post was submitted on 01 Apr 2024
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NonCredibleDefense

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A community for your defence shitposting needs

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If you want to post a non-credible take, it must be from a "credible" source (news article, politician, or military leader) and must have a comment laying out exactly why it's non-credible. Low-hanging fruit such as random Twitter and YouTube comments belong in the Matrix chat.

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Posts must be about military hardware or international security/defense. This is not the page to fawn over Youtube personalities, simp over political leaders, or discuss other areas of international policy.

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[–] [email protected] 72 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Its only stealthy at night (they just painted it black)

[–] [email protected] 45 points 7 months ago (1 children)

They forgot to take the LED lights off.

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[–] [email protected] 47 points 7 months ago (6 children)

A rifle scope that can see through walls.

[–] [email protected] 93 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (1 children)

It does this by 'inverting' what can be seen through.

It can't see through air.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 7 months ago
[–] [email protected] 27 points 7 months ago (3 children)

It has a negative magnification: it's a fisheye lens.

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[–] [email protected] 23 points 7 months ago

You can see through more than walls, you can see through everything! ...so all you can see is the empty void

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[–] [email protected] 41 points 7 months ago (3 children)

A weapon system that spreads peace, love, and freedom indiscriminately.

[–] [email protected] 32 points 7 months ago (2 children)

Indiscriminately across all of space and time... which is mostly empty.

[–] [email protected] 33 points 7 months ago

So when it averages out, it's actually less effective than cat videos.

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[–] [email protected] 34 points 7 months ago (8 children)
[–] [email protected] 48 points 7 months ago

The plan works perfectly. You are not in charge of the hive mind.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 7 months ago

Tear gas has been converted to cat nip gas.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 7 months ago

They're all still behave like a normal cat.

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[–] [email protected] 28 points 7 months ago (6 children)

An APC that only needs the power of the sun to run; no fuels.

[–] [email protected] 47 points 7 months ago

It needs the power of the whole Sun

[–] [email protected] 29 points 7 months ago (1 children)

The battery for the solar panels is so big, there's only space for a driver and one passenger

[–] [email protected] 38 points 7 months ago (2 children)
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[–] [email protected] 11 points 7 months ago

It can only move 1 inch per hour.

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[–] [email protected] 20 points 7 months ago (2 children)

It’s a plug in hybrid and silent like a Prius under 5mph.

[–] [email protected] 32 points 7 months ago (2 children)

It uses a standard US household wall plug (hard wired to the vehicle), and is extremely loud above 5mph.

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[–] [email protected] 13 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Max reverse speed is also capped at 5mph.

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[–] [email protected] 20 points 7 months ago (2 children)

A sword that appears in your hand whenever you need it, and then disappears again when you don't.

[–] [email protected] 28 points 7 months ago (1 children)

In appears IN your hand, ripping your muscles and tearing your skin

Your hand ends up looking like you played with super glue and fireworks

Also, you can only summon it twice before you run out of hands

[–] [email protected] 19 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Heh, also you don't "summon" it... it appears whenever you need it.

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[–] [email protected] 20 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (7 children)

It appears while being held by the blade.

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[–] [email protected] 19 points 7 months ago (2 children)

A gauntlet that lets you control metal like magneto.

[–] [email protected] 46 points 7 months ago (2 children)
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[–] [email protected] 17 points 7 months ago (3 children)
[–] [email protected] 15 points 7 months ago

That's a downside - imagine an AI that can't draw trying to differenciate between a friend of foe. it just shoots everyone and their cat

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[–] [email protected] 16 points 7 months ago (4 children)

A button that makes the backdoor in enemy C&C softwere.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 7 months ago

The backdoor gives you access to the enemy's copy of C&C: Red Alert.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 7 months ago

....turns out the latest upgrade to your c and c software was stolen from the enemy by cyber squad, and most of your assets on the southern front are now controlled by five primary school cs:go players in Fulham.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 7 months ago (2 children)

It's spotted within 5 minutes by some nerd who noticed that the program took an extra ten seconds to load and immediately wanted to know why.

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[–] [email protected] 15 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Too stealthy. Crews can't find it.

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[–] [email protected] 15 points 7 months ago (5 children)

A gun that switched everyone's gender but not their sex.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 7 months ago

It always fires twice in rapid succession

[–] [email protected] 14 points 7 months ago

But it's rapid fire

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[–] [email protected] 15 points 7 months ago (4 children)

Dima, Ivan, I need weapon from you that only hurts bad guys!

[–] [email protected] 27 points 7 months ago

The device fails because moral relativism (as discussed by philosophers like Gilbert Harman) and the complexity of ethical theories (such as utilitarianism by John Stuart Mill and deontology by Immanuel Kant) make it impossible for a machine to accurately judge "bad" actions or intentions, given the deep subjectivity and cultural variance in ethics.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 7 months ago

it only hurts them, cannot actually incapacitate or kill them. you have a torture device. task failed successfully?

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[–] [email protected] 14 points 7 months ago (4 children)

It can pierce through any armor.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 7 months ago

But only if no one is wearing it.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 7 months ago

But only the armor. Bullet passes through helmet, stops when it hits skull.

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 7 months ago (2 children)

a hydrogen powered artillery cannon with 2 kamikazi drones equipped

[–] [email protected] 15 points 7 months ago (1 children)

The hydrogen can only be inserted in solid form by hand

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 7 months ago (3 children)

Robotic Christopher Walken.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 7 months ago (2 children)
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