this post was submitted on 27 Mar 2024
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Trans

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General trans community.

Rules:

  1. Follow all blahaj.zone rules

  2. All posts must be trans-related. Other queer-related posts go to c/lgbtq.

  3. Don't post negative, depressing news articles about trans issues unless there is a call to action or a way to help.

Resources:

Best resource: https://github.com/cvyl/awesome-transgender Site with links to resources for just about anything.

Trevor Project: crisis mental health services for LGBTQ people, lots of helpful information and resources: https://www.thetrevorproject.org/

The Gender Dysphoria Bible: useful info on various aspects of gender dysphoria: https://genderdysphoria.fyi/en

StainedGlassWoman: Various useful essays on trans topics: https://stainedglasswoman.substack.com/

Trans resources: https://trans-resources.info/

[USA] Resources for trans people in the South: https://southernequality.org/resources/transinthesouth/#provider-map

[USA] Report discrimination: https://action.aclu.org/legal-intake/report-lgbtqhiv-discrimination

[USA] Keep track on trans legislation and news: https://www.erininthemorning.com/

[GERMANY] Bundesverband Trans: Find medical trans resources: https://www.bundesverband-trans.de/publikationen/leitfaden-fuer-behandlungssuchende/

[GERMANY] Trans DB: Insurance information (may be outdated): https://transdb.de/

[GERMANY] Deutsche Gesellschaft für Transidentität und Intersexualität: They have contact information for their advice centers and some general information for trans and intersex people. They also do activism: dgti.org

*this is a work in progress, and these resources are courtesy of users like you! if you have a resource that helped you out in your trans journey, comment below in the pinned post and I'll add here to pass it on

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This could be the biggest step that was hard for you to start. Or maybe there was a particularly stressful time during your transition that really weighed on you.

How did you overcome this and what did it teach you?

-Olivia ✌🏻

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 7 months ago

I don't know about "hardest", but my relationship with my own queerness has been the longest constant that I've struggled with during the length of my transition.

Initially, I struggled to embrace a side of myself that I'd been denied. I was trans, but "not queer" because queer community and queer folk were so far removed from my life until that point, that it felt like I was claiming something I hadn't earned. (Interestingly, I didn't struggle with my gender identity in a similar fashion)

I eventually got more exposure to queer folks and queer community and realised that they were "my people". And I learned to embrace my queerness and love it, but no sooner did I do so, than I started to lose it. I was dating men, and people were no longer identifying me as trans when they saw me. Even people I work with sort of "forget" that I'm trans. And that's the ideal that so many of us long for right? But what it felt like to me, was that I had just found the courage and self love to step out of a closet and accept my queerness, and achieved the goals I thought I wanted, only to find myself involuntarily in another closet.

These days, I'm in a poly relationship with a woman and a non binary bean, so it's less of an issue, but I still feel it at work, and around strangers, where my queerness is something I have to constantly talk about, or otherwise it's simply not seen. Even when I wear queer stuff people kinda just "forget" and they assume that I want them to forget, as if blending in with the society that teaches me I have to hide is something I desire for more than pragmatic reasons.

Just yesterday, a woman I have worked with for years asked me why my necklace and lanyard were matching (they both have the trans flag on them). I pointed out that I also have a matching wrist band and shoe laces, and that they're the trans flag, and she was like "Oh yeah, that's right, I guess that makes sense". I hate it...