Showerthoughts

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A "Showerthought" is a simple term used to describe the thoughts that pop into your head while you're doing everyday things like taking a shower, driving, or just daydreaming. The best ones are thoughts that many people can relate to and they find something funny or interesting in regular stuff.

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Hanging out with my nieces/nephews I now understand most the discipline I received as a child was most likely because I was being annoying and nothing to do with right or wrong. (lemmy.world)

submitted 8 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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[–] [email protected] 79 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (2 children)

You are correct (here comes the but) but often times that acting out isn't just to be annoying. As a kid, being disruptive is sometimes the only way you can get the attention of your adult. We treat kids like anything outside of their basic needs is unimportant.

Not wanting to lecture anyone I'll leave it at that.

[–] [email protected] 30 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I agree wholeheartedly.

actual addition to conversation

The only instinct a child has to get attention is to be disruptive. Eventually they learn patience, better verbiage, and how to time their interactions with others. Time isn't really a concept yet and things are almost an "on/off" switch.

Hunger doesn't exist during playtime until Hunger is activated, in which case, Hunger is all that exists. Hunger can only be eliminated with help as the cookies remain furiously out of reach. HELP!

"Attention-seeking behavior" is "hey I need help with something" in their first language. It's up to the adults to figure out what's going on. Finding out why they are being disruptive helps, a lot. If they feel they're being ignored, work out spending time with them as reassurance... when convenient. If they're hungry, take a moment to procure a proper snack, and then they'll be satisfied. They might not even know what they need - do any of us really - and that's where listening can be helpful.

Again, time not being easily explained such an on/off age.

I am not a child therapist. I've just worked with too many "difficult" kids.

[–] [email protected] 37 points 8 months ago (2 children)

While I don't disagree, I have a point to make.

Recently watched a home movie of our kids when they are little (18 years ago), so ages between 3 & 8.

It was a little horrifying to hear the absolute despair in our voices as my wife and I kept asking one kid after the other, "please stop."

Three kids, all desperately trying to get ALL the attention. It's amazing the five of us survived.

I don't particularly recall the day the video was made. Hearing our voices, it sounds like we were just completely past the breaking point. Yet, consider: that was a moment that we considered adorable enough to record forever. Watching it now, they were adorable. However, it sounds like we were dying inside without realizing it.

I hear the same voices in every video. I love my kids and I love being a parent, but it's amazing looking back how much that and all the other demands on us was just absolutely crushing the life out of us.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 8 months ago

raises a glass Parenting is far from easy.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 8 months ago

Need to get back to silent videos and photos only.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 8 months ago

Let’s not forget kids being super happy, having a great time, playing loudly, just enjoying life to the max, can be annoying.