Just turned 3 toddler has been saying factually untrue things and trying to get me to agree/repeat these things. They won't let me just ignore their statements and push for an affirmation. Not affirming leads to tears and a tantrum. I've been just saying 'ok' or 'I think you're wrong but ok' but mostly letting things go if they seem trivial like: 'Ice cream is not cold!', 'It's not dark yet!', 'Snow isn't white', etc... I've been mostly targetting statements they make about other people and their feelings or desires like 'You're not tired!', 'She doesn't want to sing.', 'He's not hungry.', etc... and letting the meltdowns happen in those situations but my spouse is concerned that I'm making toddler believe they can have their own facts outside of reality and that I should push back every time something factually inaccurate comes up. I feel like this behavior is probably developmentally normal and like everything else, we need to target specific things to work on one at a time. Thoughts?
It's fine. I wouldn't just ignore it though. Maybe question why they think these things. 'What makes you sure he's not hungry? Did you ask him?', 'Are you sure she didn't want to sing? I think she has a pretty voice.'
Your toddler is coughing e their desires more than denying facts. If anything, it's an expression of imagination and should be encouraged with guidance away from just telling outright lies.