this post was submitted on 29 Oct 2023
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‘It’s quite soul-destroying’: how we fell out of love with dating apps::For a decade, apps have dominated dating. But now singles are growing tired of swiping and are looking for new ways to meet people – or reverting to old ones

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[–] [email protected] 132 points 1 year ago (4 children)

The problem with dating apps is the commodification of human relationships. The way people use these apps is too superficial. They're looking for the perfect man or woman, so if there's something they don't like or that person has a flaw, they don't take the time to really get to know them on a deep level. There's a lot to choose from! FOMO!

Perfection does not exist in this world and we must really try to connect on a deep level. Unfortunately, some people use these apps for window shopping and shallow relationships.

[–] [email protected] 31 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

On the backend, no company could fulfill their promise if a “special sauce” to successful matching that was especially better than anything anyone else had, so they focused on impulse matching that worked best for short-term satisfaction and hookups. This worked for the dynamic of what people expected, and the reviews and word-of-mouth remained generally high— until we all got burned out on meaningless, futile, superficial relationships.

So, what comes next?

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 year ago

I agree with this but would say it's just one of the problems.

I always have trouble with the idea that in reality these dating apps can't want you to be perfectly successful or else you'd never use them again. There's a real insidiousness there

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago

7 of 9 just lookin for perfection baby

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

I saw a terrible new dating app that was all about how super incredible you are and how you should only accept true partners who can battle your wits and income level, while it made vague references to coders and crypto.

It's a website for those antisocial nerds that think themselves superior and anyone that goes on there is always going to be judging every partner as to their closeness to perfect. Anyone on there is a narcissist for sure.

What a terrible reduction of spouse to that. No wonder no one is having kids and people are lonely. That is how the "elite" view themselves and each other. Our society deserves to be burnt to the ground.