I've thought since most of this began that it didn't really matter what he said so much as what he did. And what he did (and continues to do) is commit LLM-generated code.
But reading your post, you're right that it's also extremely concerning that he's using right-wing dogwhistles and moving the kernel project in a more authoritarian direction. And that's largely a what he "said" thing.
I hope the kernel does get forked. I'll switch in a heartbeat.