It's not hard to get laid, contrary to popular belief. Most people love sex.

Actually, if you hadn't of been playing Ed Sheeran, multiple people would've joined in.

his [music's] gotten me laid. Can't be that bad

We'll let you judge the amount of help you feel you'd need ;-)

Ed Sheeran apparently holds the record for

• longest climb to #1 (19 weeks)
• longest top-100 chart time (33 weeks)
• only artist to have multiple songs exceed 10 weeks at #1 (whither TSwift?)

I can't say whether his music is good, but I can say it appears others like his tunes a lot, for sexy time or not.

Imagine a donkey that wanted to sing, then put that voice to the music of a lonely orphan who just found out that candy exists.

No, they're just like U2 as well. That's the triad of UK "I was inspired by" artists. Though Ed leads by far with the lawsuit count.