If you meet me irl, pls throw rocks at me until I stop moving because my mind went to dogs and I legit deserve to be stoned to death for that thought.

Oh, and when I stop moving keep throwing rocks at my corpse for another ten minutes just to ensure I've truly shuffled off this mortal coil

Edit. Or just inject me with a syringe filled with apple juice. Should be fun to see what happens to me. I deserve an excruciatingly painful death, so get as creative as you wish.