▲ 199 ▼ Outgoing press secretary Karoline Leavitt (cdn.imgchest.com) submitted 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) by ooliiu@lemmy.world to c/mildlyinfuriating@lemmy.world 51 comments fedilink hide all child comments There is no evidence that Biden bought $50 million of condoms for Gaza There is no evidence that Abrego Garcia is a member of MS-13
[–] mp3@lemmy.ca 44 points 1 week ago (1 child) May she always stub her pinky toe on her bedside table when she needs to pee at night. permalink fedilink source hideshow 2 child comments replies: [–] fartographer@lemmy.world 6 points 1 week ago (3 children) May she always sneeze just before she reaches the toilet. And may the droplets of pee upset her enough that she stress-farts tiny wet poops that cause her to suddenly clench and lose her balance and stumble just enough to accidentally pee just a little bit more just before she reaches for the lid. May her stiffened posture cause her to strain as she bends to lift the lid, and that she re-stubs her toe on the front of the toilet; just heard enough to make her feel defeated and lose her restraint on the steam that begins before she's properly sat down so that she sits on her own pee that also drips into her underwear. Finally, may her efforts to clean up wake her up too much so that she only manages to fall back asleep 10 minutes before her alarm goes off. permalink fedilink source parent hideshow 6 child comments replies: [–] Jankatarch@lemmy.world 9 points 1 week ago May she burn to death. permalink fedilink source parent [–] echodot@feddit.uk 4 points 1 week ago This reads like a fetish fanfiction. permalink fedilink source parent [–] Smoogs@lemmy.world 1 point 1 week ago* strangely specific. I'm sorry if this happened to you even just once or any one of those things. I'm not sorry if all of it happens to her constantly and forever. i hope your wish comes true. permalink fedilink source parent
[–] fartographer@lemmy.world 6 points 1 week ago (3 children) May she always sneeze just before she reaches the toilet. And may the droplets of pee upset her enough that she stress-farts tiny wet poops that cause her to suddenly clench and lose her balance and stumble just enough to accidentally pee just a little bit more just before she reaches for the lid. May her stiffened posture cause her to strain as she bends to lift the lid, and that she re-stubs her toe on the front of the toilet; just heard enough to make her feel defeated and lose her restraint on the steam that begins before she's properly sat down so that she sits on her own pee that also drips into her underwear. Finally, may her efforts to clean up wake her up too much so that she only manages to fall back asleep 10 minutes before her alarm goes off. permalink fedilink source parent hideshow 6 child comments replies: [–] Jankatarch@lemmy.world 9 points 1 week ago May she burn to death. permalink fedilink source parent [–] echodot@feddit.uk 4 points 1 week ago This reads like a fetish fanfiction. permalink fedilink source parent [–] Smoogs@lemmy.world 1 point 1 week ago* strangely specific. I'm sorry if this happened to you even just once or any one of those things. I'm not sorry if all of it happens to her constantly and forever. i hope your wish comes true. permalink fedilink source parent
[–] Jankatarch@lemmy.world 9 points 1 week ago May she burn to death. permalink fedilink source parent
[–] echodot@feddit.uk 4 points 1 week ago This reads like a fetish fanfiction. permalink fedilink source parent
[–] Smoogs@lemmy.world 1 point 1 week ago* strangely specific. I'm sorry if this happened to you even just once or any one of those things. I'm not sorry if all of it happens to her constantly and forever. i hope your wish comes true. permalink fedilink source parent