this post was submitted on 07 Sep 2023
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Asklemmy
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Step parent. While not entirely thankless (depending on the kids involved) it's tremendously underappreciated.
So much expectation that you do things for kids that aren't yours.
Don't get me wrong - it can still be rewarding in many ways, and my stepkids and I love each other like blood. We have a fantastic relationship.
But it gets under my skin every time I think about how little their own father has done for them, and I've had to pick up the (financial) burden, yet that prick will be the one who gets to walk my stepdaughter down the aisle.
That depends in her because it would be HER wedding.
If she is grateful enough, you'll get to walk her because you would have been her real dad all her life.
There is no written law that the bio that most be the only one who can walk her, its all just stupid wedding traditions.
If she grows to be a brat, and makes her bio dad walk her, then she doesn't see you as her real dad, and would be something for you to reflect on.
I hear you, but it's not quite as straightforward as that. It's hard to explain (as family dynamics always are).
I'm sure that's true in plenty of families, but sadly not ours. My stepkids' dad is a entitled and materialistic, and he's married someone just like him. They even try and "teach" the kids that you don't have to thank wait staff at restaurants, because they're paid to do the job.
It's funny - my wife and I were each originally married to the same type of selfish arsehole, then found each other after our respective marriages broke up. Our exes, however, didn't wait that long. Kinda says everything...
Parenting is absolutely a job. It's a full-time job on top of whatever other job you have.