submitted 6 days ago by Empty@lemmynal.space to c/relationships@lemmy.world

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5 years ago, I was cheated on.

We have 4 children (1 adult). To this day, I can't be intimate with her. I'm still mad. She's still friends with him.

Yeah, I know - divorce. I know that not divorcing her is teaching my kids how a bad relationship works, but I want both of us present for them.

How do I get... not freedom, but solitude, while still being present for my kids?

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[-] Empty@lemmynal.space 1 points 2 days ago

We tried couples counseling.

She picked the counselor. Her counselor. The same one that put her first, and told me we couldn't talk about what she did.

I gave up on counseling after that.

[-] PlasticExistence@lemmy.world 1 points 2 days ago

So your options are to try again or leave her or stay miserable. What else can you do?

this post was submitted on 17 Feb 2026

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