A combination of many things. Although I was never that "brainwash" by propaganda, I did have a phase where I was suspicious of AES states, accusing them of “state capitalism.” One significant factor that pushed me towards supporting them was realizing that Stalin didn't “betray the revolution” and that he was not only a socialist but an intellectual as well. Certainly not the caricature of a brute portrayed by liberals, so dumb as to have apparently planned ww2 battles on a globe (instead of a map lol). Khrushchev lied, of course. And that heap of rubbish has caused so much damage to our socialist cause. It is a similar process to my opinion of Xi Jinping, and I soon realized that he was not a brutish dictator. Xi is a decent man who loves his country and the Chinese people. Likewise with the dictatorship of the proletariat, which I eventually came to understand as a contrast to a dictatorship of the bourgeoisie. It makes no sense that the communist party in China would oppress their citizens. The CPC is significantly improving their lives in every single aspect that affects them. If a communist party would do those things for me, I would gladly and voluntarily put a muzzle on any anti communists who talk shit about the DOTP. I agree with censorship too, insofar as it protects the socialist cause against reactionaries. In short, the revolution that feeds me gets my support after all.